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Scared of further alien attacks, United States to arm rebel aliens across Milky Way

04, Jul 2016 By manithan

Washington DC: Concerned with increasing alien attacks, United States senate has passed a bill for arming rebel aliens and if sources are to be believed, President Obama has also given his approval for the bill.

Obama has already started meeting Rebel Aliens in a classified location. Leaked by hackers is one such picture alleged to be taken a month back
Obama has already started meeting Rebel Aliens in a classified location. Leaked by hackers is one such picture alleged to be taken a month back

The focus of the whole world has once again turned to the US Senate today, as it passed a Bill, named as Arming Rebel Aliens Against Alien Invasion (ARA3I).

Not alone has it got a thumping majority among the American Senators, it has also got the approval of Obama within few hours. Termed as a revolutionary Bill by the American media, it has been celebrated with exchange of chocolates and kisses by fellow Americans.

In an exclusive to Faking News, the key person behind drafting of this Bill, American Republican Senator from Ohio, Kenneth Lukewalker said, “I am just happy that we have all come together for a landmark moment in the history of mankind. This is the moment we had to join hands and raise our voice against the invading evil aliens from outer space.”

“It had been a routine that USA had to face an alien invasion once in a decade. We have seen Aliens, Predators, giant monstrous aliens and huge spaceships covering a large portion of Earth, primarily targeting our glorious country. We have broken them and sent them back spinning to space. But, we had to waste enormous amount of resources and our precious people during every alien invasion,” he added.

Standing next to him, Democrat Senator from Nevada, Robin Vader said, “He is right! How many years do we have to look up at the sky and see the huge hovering spaceship with gaping mouths? How long do we have to run like chickens trying to prevent being obliterated by green color light attacks from aliens? How long do we have to attack and face the vomit-inducing death of aliens? Enough is enough. We shall not let the aliens invade our country anymore. That is why; I supported Kenneth from the beginning, even though we were in opposite camps.”

As per the bill, it has been accepted unanimously that, USA will be arming the rebel aliens across Milky way.

“We will be scouting for aliens that are smaller in numbers and far weaker in technology. Then, we will fund them and train them with the help of CIA. We will invite them to White House and praise them as revolutionaries. Then, we will send them to wreck the planets of major aliens and keep them funding till major threats to USA is quashed,” said one top military general from Pentagon, on conditions of anonymity.