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Pakistan to send Mujahideens to Moon to free it from Earth

24, Aug 2013 By idiot420

Islamabad, Pakistan. Taking its global jihad to the next level, Pakistan has announced that it will free the “sacred moon” from the “evil earth” by sending mujahideens (Pakistan’s biggest export product) who will fight for its freedom.

“Pakistan supports of freedom of beautiful places that are under the rule of oppressors. Kashmir is one such place where we are fighting, and now we are targeting the Moon,” Hafiz Mureed, a Pakistan Army officer who is also part-time terrorist confirmed the giant leap that Pakistan is willing to take for the betterment of humanity.

Moon
After biting the Kashmiri apple, Pakistan is now aiming for the moon.

To get global jihad support and funding from Saudi Arabia, Pakistan has claimed that it was another pious mission where the moon, which has a special place in Islam, would be freed from the control of earth, which is currently ruled by Israel and the USA.

Eager to know how Pakistan will set the Moon free, Faking News contacted a senior Pakistani army officer.

“We have successfully tested our latest 1 million light-year range rocket Ghauri-XXX. Our army will place it in the deepest craters on Moon and fix it permanently to its surface. Once the rocket is fired, it will take the moon with itself and place it 1 lakh light-year away in a parallel universe where Pakistan rules the Earth,” the officer disclosed the grand plan.

“Once the real world, where we are currently living, gets rids of all kaafir elements and the Earth becomes Dar al-Islam, we will bring the Moon back,” the officer further added.

Sources have confirmed that Pak Cyber Army has downloaded techniques to go to Moon by hacking NASA website and are confident of its Moon mission.

“If our mission fails, it will still be a successful suicide mission!” the officer explained how it was a win-win situation for Pakistan.

While it may claim it to be of religious importance, Pakistan’s ambitious move is being seen as a desperate attempt to leave its mark in the field of space exploration. However, some conspiracy theorists have a completely different take on the matter.

“It is a ploy of Pakistan to rehabilitate its valued guests and citizens. They are sending most wanted terrorists like Dawood Ibrahim and Hafiz Saeed to a place far away from Earth, from where they can run their networks without fear,” claimed a theorist.