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Bollywood singer Mika Singh to be recruited by Indian army to slap Pervez Musharraf

12, Jun 2015 By @jurnoleast

New Delhi: Bollywood singer Mika Singh, who was in news recently for slapping a doctor at a concert, has been roped in by the Indian army for a special mission, to slap ex-Army Chief of Pakistan Pervez Musharraf.

No use gymming sir. Mika's two finger slap will get you back to your senses.
No use gymming sir. Mika’s two finger slap will get you back to your senses.

Speaking to Faking News reporter exclusively General Dalbir Singh Suhag said, “Pervez Musharraf has been giving out inflammatory statements lately. He is constantly trying to foment hatred between the two nations. If their nukes are not for Shab-e-Baraat, we too have not made nuclear missiles for Independence Day parades. However, we feel an eye for an eye is not the solution because we cannot let the diplomatic process derail because of one immature man. So we decided to rope in Mika Singh for our mission.”

According to our sources in the army, the decision on the bollywood singer was taken after army personnel saw him slapping a doctor at a concert in Delhi. The victim suffered internal injuries due to the slap. Army personnel believe that one slap by Mika Singh will get Pervez Musharraf back to his senses. Its just a matter of one tight slap.

Mika Singh was ecstatic with the news. Speaking to us from his house in Delhi he said, “I am very happy with the news. Finally someone has realized my talent. It’s an honor to serve the nation.”Army is not revealing any details related to the mission right now, however Intelligence sources are sharing information about Pervez Musharraf’s whereabouts with Mika Singh.

Meanwhile, Mr. Musharraf’s critics in Pakistan are happy with the news. One such critic on the condition of anonymity said, “Finally India is taking a step in the right direction. Miyan Musharraf is irrelevant to Pakistan. He is trying his best to get back to politics, because he is a desperate jobless man. He has created a twitter account. He is sending LinkedIn requests to everyone and constantly posting selfies on Facebook. We wish Mika Singh all the best. Allah kare unka thappad Musharraf ke hosh thikane laye.”