Mumbai. In a sensational development, a razor blade today confessed to have inflicted far more cuts and nicks on a human being during shaving than those inflicted by a vampire during full moon.
Mark Sharp, the blade who has been residing at Versova in house of a filmmaker, made this dramatic confession when the house owner was shaving to get ready for a late night party.
“From a cut on the chins to a chip near the lips, I’ve explored all possible areas from where I could get the hemoglobin and protein rich drink,” Sharp disclosed the shocking truth in his confession.
“Red drink gives me teeth,” the blade further revealed how every cut inflicted by it only made it more resolute for the next cut.
The filmmaker, who is clean shaven despite the fact that grown up beard and long hair are taken as signs of creativity, confirmed that he witnessed the confession and recorded it on camera:
“To be frank, it was horrific! But come to think of it, we never realized this horror when we got all those shaving cuts!” he said.
“I mean, it’s as good as living with a vampire. And we are hardly concerned about it!” he added.
“But now I’m confused. Should I grow beard?” the victim of the metal vampire wondered.
Similar fears were expressed by many other men who watched the video.
“We used to call them ‘Safety Razor’ and thought it was a cutting edge technology that saved us from wounds, but now we understand what was ‘cutting’ about the technology,” a 23-year-old man said, “Now we have to look for a better technology.”
To the rescue of such concerned men, some professional vampire slayers say that there is a new technology, which is cutting edge but leaves no cuts on any edges of the face: Aquatouch.