Monday, 25th September, 2017

Snippets

Man kidnapped by ants after his wife repeatedly called him “honey”

22, Sep 2014 By Aditya Rane

Mumbai. In a shocking incident, Madhur Sakhre, a resident of Mumbai was kidnapped by ants in the middle of the night after his wife repeatedly called him “honey”, apparently out of love.

Mr. Sakhre was later released by his captors and has returned home safely. However, this incident has brought forward the ugly side of mushy talks that wives and girlfriends, and sometimes even friends, indulge in.

Ants
This is what ants thought they were doing.

While humans are still debating if such romantic terminology is risky and Poonam Pandey has already posted yet another bath-tub picture of herself, this time with ants protecting her modesty, the Mumbai Ants Association (MAA) has issued a public apology to Mr. Sakhre.

The spokesant was quoted saying, “We deeply regret the unfortunate kidnapping of Mr. Sakhre by the members of our association. The members mistook Mr. Sakhre to be a mocktail of desserts and hence they took him away as extra food for upcoming Diwali celebrations. We have safely delivered Mr. Sakhre back to his wife immediately after realizing our mistake.”

Upon further questioning one of the kidnapper ants, it said, “The culprit here is Mr. Sakhre’s wife. She repeatedly called him by names like honey, sugar, sweetpie and so on. This led us to believe that Mr. Sakhre is a huge mocktail of honey, sugar and other desserts. But the most important indicator was the conversation that took place on the night of the incident. Mrs. Sakhre said that Mr. Sakhre is so sweet that she felt like eating him up. This left no doubt whatsoever that Mr. Sakhre was indeed a mocktail of desserts and so we took him as reserve food for Diwali.”

Taking serious note of the development, some men’s rights activist groups have submitted a petition to the Prime Minister demanding that publicly calling of mushy names like honey etc. should be made punishable by law and labelled as “Crime against Men”.

Sources tell Faking News that PM Modi has assured that his government would take necessary steps to prevent such incidents from happening in future. However, the assurance by PM has been called “hypocritical” by a few intellectuals because Gujarat has been known for using too much of sweet and sugar.

Meanwhile, a hastag #MortienLaoAntsBhagao is now trending on Twitter.