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Hopeless moron happy with IIT cut-off marks not being raised

22, Oct 2009 By Pagal Patrakar

Patna. Tej Pratap, a class XII student of local Gyan Mandir, has expressed extreme happiness and relief over HRD Minister Kapil Sibal’s assurance that the government would not force the IITs to hike the minimum marks required to take JEE. Tej had already finalized his strategy to secure first division (above 60% marks) in the class XII exams next year and nurtured the dream of appearing at IIT-JEE. After a brief scare, he is now confident of living his dream.

According to well placed sources, even though Tej is upbeat about appearing at IIT-JEE (he had even taken part in a protest organized by a student union and burnt Kapil Sibal in effigy), he hardly has any chances of qualifying for the test and getting admission into any of the IITs. Apparently till last month, Tej thought that Irodov and Krotov were the Russian names for Electron and Proton.

Tej took part in a similar protest
Tej took part in a similar protest

“He is a big asshole. Forget being an engineer from IIT, he can’t even become a car mechanic. You know he still doesn’t know a thing about calculus. When he saw the integral symbol in the text books last week, he thought it was function symbol which was not crossed by the printers. He’d just waste his father’s money so that later on he can brag about being an IIT aspirant among girls and his future in-laws.” Prakash Ranjan, a classmate of Tej said. Prakash is expected to come out with flying colors in JEE as well as in the class XII exams. He also expressed happiness over the cut-off not being raised.

But Tej is resolute with his decision and aims to take IIT-JEE at least three times before settling for admission in any college of Delhi University for undergraduate studies. Tej is an immaculate planner and confided to us that if he failed at IIT-JEE, which our sources confirm as being a sure thing, he’d start preparations for UPSC exams and aim to become an IAS officer. And if he failed to become an IAS officer as well, after exhausting all the possible attempts, he might think of becoming a journalist. His father is petrified at the possibilities.

“I wish government had raised the cut-off. I know my son is hopeless but if I don’t provide him money to fill up the forms, he’d accuse me of being a bad dad in the future. I’ve seen many of my colleagues financing such whims of their sons for long long times, and Tej seems to have similar plans for me. I don’t know what to do.” Krishna Rai, father of Tej who teaches History in the same school, expressed his frustration and helplessness.

Despite lack of belief in his son’s abilities, Krishna Rai had given Tej some money to join a coaching institute for IIT-JEE a few months back, but apparently Tej used that money to join a gym to develop six-pack abs.