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Bored techie thanks Satya Nadella for sending 500 MB windows updates daily, keeping him occupied

10, Apr 2015 By Pagla Ghoda

Bengaluru: Praneet Puttegowda a techie employed with Infosys has written an open letter to Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella and thanked him for sending him enough windows updates every-day to keep him perfectly occupied.

Praneet who was a B.Tech. graduate and a campus hire has been “on bench” without projects with Infosys for past 5 years. Below is his open letter as published on major news websites [with minor grammatical edits only to retain the originality of Praneet’s emotions]:

Satya bhai,

I am so thankful to you bhaiya, for giving enough work to me everyday. I am full happy. I used to come to office every day and I used to get full tense. That is because I have no work, no project to do for past 5 years. But last few days I have been getting some 500 MB of “important” and “very important” updates daily which windows forces me to install. Every morning, I spend full 4 hours in downloading those updates; that time I cannot use my computer to do anything, it gets too slow. Because of this I go for a walk outside, I write poems on rains, clouds and gals. I am discovering myself as an artist. Then after 4 hours I go for my lunch. When I am back from lunch I start to install those downloaded updates, it again takes 4 hours for them to install. And again at that time I cannot do anything on my system, it gets too slow. I just put these updates on installation and I go to play TT and Carrom with colleagues. I have made many new friends. All thanks to you bhaiya.

Praneet's window screen every morning.
Praneet’s window screen every morning.

These windows updates have other benefits too. Last to last week my boss asked me to prepare some excel sheet. I was so tense. I said appa devre, what will I do now? I have not touched any spreadsheet for last 5 years. I don’t even know what to click on my desktop to open excel. But when I came back to my desk and opened my computer I saw windows asking me to do some 650 MB of updates, I was so delighted bhaiya. I told my boss, It will take 3 days for me to prepare that excel as I have huge amount of pending windows updates to be installed. My boss gave that work to someone else. I was saved again. All thanks to you Satya bhai.

And I am not alone, there are hundreds of other engineers like me who have found new lives because of these windows updates. Few of us have even come together and formed Windows-Updater Smart Society (WUSS) within our company. As part of WUSS we organizes sports tournaments, recreational events, pot luck lunches and motivational lectures for members in the free time we get when all our computers are installing windows updates. Again, all thanks to you.

With tears in my eyes I tell you that God bless you for the great work that you have been doing.

I won’t take more time of yours bhaiya, I know you are a busy man, if a normal person like me is installing some 500 MB updates everyday, then being the Windows CEO you must be installing some five thousand GB updates everyday. Take care, God bless.

Thanking you

Yours faithfully

Praneet Puttegowda

B.Tech. Computer science (Java 6, .NET, SQL, XML, MS Office certified)