Thursday, 21st September, 2017

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USA announces new Visa categories for Indians after Lok Sabha election results

22, May 2014 By Fakerazzi

In order to appease hurt sentiments all along, USA has announced few new visa categories for Indians, listed below:

Regular Visas

H1A: Americans have decided to outsource social development work to certified Modi army volunteers. In order to assuage Modi’s hurt feelings, the certifications has been left entirely on the discretion of  Mr. Amit Shah.

L1S: This will be used by lobbying firms for social media experts. American lobbying firms are opening offices in Gujarat now. Eyery time there is some major campaign in USA, few from these offices will shift to USA for on ground monitoring in their USA offices.

Modi US Visa
Modi who has suddenly become worthy of being issued a Visa by US.

R1S: This Visa is for the special category of secular folks who have no longer have any jobs in India and may be hounded by non-secular crowd.

B1SM: This business visa is for media folks who always dutifully served the cause of secularism in India and will be required to do so during short term assignment when elections are underway in USA.

Special Visas categories

RG Class: People who can show infections smile immediately after taking responsibility for a major debacle. Mainly from the Liberal arts classes of private universities all across the world.

Onion Class: People with expertise in creating onion style news item during election times. Majorly from SW engineer population.

Debating Class: Immense capability to sit for 6 hours in a TV debate and make no harmful comments. Mainly from Bengal.

Honest Class: All AAP members are automatically qualified.

News Junkie class: People who can go through news on all mediums simultaneously and still makes no sense.

Conspiracy generators: Any topic in the world is controversial as per these folks. They can be used for selective unrest whenever needed.