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Rahul Gandhi to retire after 200 rallies, Bharat Nirman ads to be played instead

17, Oct 2013 By Pagal Patrakar

New Delhi. Realizing that too much shouting in the rallies might strain his vocal chords, Congress has decided to retire Rahul Gandhi after he completes addressing 200 rallies.

Rahul Gandhi
Rahul Gandhi speaking at a rally

However, Rahul will not be replaced with Priyanka Gandhi as the star campaigner of the party. Instead, the party will play Bharat Nirman ads where a girl called Priya will inform the crowds about the achievements of the party.

“Rahul ji was anyway repeating the same stuff as shown in those ads – Food Security Bill, Land Acquisition Bill, Direct Cash Transfers, etc. – the only difference being he has been shouting while Priya says the same things with smile and style,” a party source explained.

“We thought it will be a better idea if we show the girl, I mean, the ads. It can attract more crowds and it will also help Rahul ji relax,” the source added.

To make sure Rahul Gandhi’s retirement is compared with Sachin Tendulkar’s retirement in the media, the party has decided that Rahul too will complete 200 rallies just like Sachin will complete 200 test matches.

“In fact, Sonia Gandhi ji will attend Rahul Gandhi’s 200th rally just like Tendulkar’s mother is expected to attend his 200th test,” the source told Faking News.