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MPs to be chained inside parliament to prevent incidents like pepper spray attack

13, Feb 2014 By idiot420

New Delhi. After pepper spray was used by an MP to protest over Telangana in Lok Sabha today, government has decided that future parliamentary sessions will see the honorable MPs being chained to their seats for their own well-being.

Much needed change
Much needed change

Sources tell Faking News that the decision was taken by UPA chairperson Sonia Gandhi, who wished that every MP was as civilized and well behaved as Dr. Manmohan Singh.

“He doesn’t disturb any one. He doesn’t shout. He doesn’t run into the well of the house. Sonia ji asked us to ensure that every MP was like him,” Rajeev Shukla, MoS, Parliamentary Affairs said.

After brief psychoanalysis of Dr. Singh, it was concluded that he was well behaved because he was chained.

“Figuratively,” Rajeev Shukla explained, “I mean, we often hear criticism that the Prime Minister is not free to take his own decisions and he’s chained by Sonia ji’s orders. And we realized that it was true, and it was working well for Dr. Singh. Look how well meaning and cultured he is.”

As a result, it was decided that all MPs, and not only from Andhra Pradesh Congress, will be chained to their seats for the rest of the parliament sessions.

Since it allows an MP to shout, experts have pointed out that this didn’t violate the fundamental rights of an elected representative.

Having witnessed the pepper spray attack earlier today, most of the MPs are happy with the new arrangement. However some believe that it was not enough.

“What if they spit on our face?” said a terrified MP who was still coughing.