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Unable to scream due to sore throats, Congress MPs to now disrupt Parliament using Usha Uthup songs

13, Aug 2015 By Pagla Ghoda

New Delhi: Consistent screaming and disrupting Parliament session continuously for past few days has taken a huge toll on throats of protesting Congress MPs. Several MPs have reported sore throats, throat infections and tonsillitis. Hence going forward Sonia and team plans to play Usha Uthup’s songs in loud volume to cause disruption in Parliament and forcing the speaker to adjourn the session.

Congress party protesting outside the Parliament.
Congress party protesting outside the Parliament.

Congress party spokesperson Dhananjay Jha spoke to media outside the Parliament and said,  “Today when madam Sushma Swaraj was trying to speak, some of our MPs were constantly shouting ‘Sushma Chuppi todo (Sushma please speak)’, to prevent her from speaking. Since she did not stop speaking our MPs also continued shouting which proved counterproductive for a few of them. As soon as the session ended 35 of our 44 MPs collapsed due to extreme throat pain. They were immediately given medical care but the damage was done.”

He further continued, “Tomorrow our strategy will be different. We will ask the BJP leaders to speak-up and break their silence and as soon as they start speaking we will play Usha Uthup’s 17 songs back to back in full volume till the house is adjourned.”

“We have arranged for high quality Dolby Digital speakers usually used in IMAX like theaters for an Armageddon sound effect and also procured high quality amplifier equipment to give resonating beats to the background. This technique I believe hasn’t been used at all in the history of political protests anywhere in the world, and hence it will work razor sharp,” a confident Jha concluded.

While it is not yet clear on how the BJP government will respond to this audio onslaught by Congress, several BJP MPs have ordered huge bales of cotton for themselves.

It is also being rumored that senior BJP leader Amit Shah has ordered a few buckets of water to be filled and kept in the parliament house tomorrow.