Thursday, 24th August, 2017

Snippets

MLAs declare independence day sale; 50% off from the regular rates

13, Aug 2017 By RT

Chennai. The sitting MLAs of Tamilnadu have declared an independence day sale; 50% off from the regular rates, it is learnt by Faking News. There will also be a flash sale one day prior to the independence day, it is learnt by Faking News.

Bengaluru : Gujarat Congress MLA's showing their unity at a press conference at a resort on the outskirts of Bengaluru on Sunday. PTI Photo by Shailendra Bhojak   (PTI7_30_2017_000149A)
Bengaluru : Gujarat Congress MLA’s showing their unity at a press conference at a resort on the outskirts of Bengaluru on Sunday. PTI Photo by Shailendra Bhojak (PTI7_30_2017_000149A)

“We are the hottest commodities in the Indian democracy. Politics is the best investment in the entire country. Easily beats the mutual funds or any other risky business. For instance, I have invested 2 crores to become an MLA. So far, I have made about 20 times of that money in selling myself alone. Then there are transfer fees, tender fees and commission etc., On occasions like independence day, I am glad to offer myself on sale”, an MLA told Faking News.

“I am an independent MLA. I make the most on the good deals whenever an MLA’s vote is in demand. To establish the independent and nonpartisan element, I offer myself at 50% rates on independence days. On Republic days, my rate depends on the summer vacation plans, two months from then. Usually it is in the range of a few crores plus all travelling expenses for the entire family” an independent MLA told Faking News.

“When online shopping companies can announce sale for independence day and announce that as Freedom sale, we can do it too. My offer is suitably named as All-in-one sale. I am also doing a contract sale, much like BCCI yearly contract on cricket players. Politics is a serious game and I am a player” an MLA fresh from signing a 2 year contract told Faking news in all smiles.

“This EPS and OPS split has given us a political opportunity. Now, the merger talks presents us with a political bonanza. Long live democracy! The electorate thinks they control the system. It is us who control the system. Do you think the people of the state will learn?” he laughed out loud to our Faking News reporter.

Meanwhile, the #MLAFORSALE is fast becoming a viral trend in all the other states of India, it is learnt by Faking News.