Saturday, 25th November, 2017

Snippets

Karunanidhi to do a Prison Break to rescue Kanimozhi from Tihar jail

23, May 2011 By Ankur Nigam

New Delhi. If sources are to be believed then India is all set to witness its own real life version of the Prison Break. This time it will be the DMK head Karunanidhi who will do a Scofield to help his daughter and Rajya Sabha MP Kanimozhi escape from the Tihar Jail.

It should be noted that Prison Break was a famous American TV serial drama in which Scofield rescues his brother out of a prison by staging a bank robbery and getting himself to be arrested and sent to the same prison where his brother has been held until execution on false charges.

Fearing that the option of staging a bank robbery might turn out to be a process in futility as the country’s treasury has already been robbed off with the 2G scam, Karunanidhi is planning to stage a robbery of Rahul Gandhi’s most cherished possession of Italian actress Monica Bellucci’s original pic signed by her.

Inside the jail, Kani has already been informed of the plan.

“Due to lack of court date on Sunday, Kani was relaxing in her cell flipping between Sun and Kalaignar TV while dunking Parle-G biscuits in tea, when she got a visitor. Immediately after she was allegedly told about the plan, I saw her secretly summoning her neighboring cell-mates Madhuri Gupta and Sonu Punjaban,” said the jail warden who was later suspended for allegedly humming the Raja Ko Rani Se Pyaar Ho Gaya tune.

Karunanidhi set to do a Prison Break
Karunanidhi is reported to have smiled over the idea after being glum for many days over the election defeat and arrest of his daughter.

The suspended warden claims that Kani has finalized the role assignment for the escape job on the big day. Madhuri Gupta will grab the role of spying on the prison faculties and Sonu Punjaban will get the job of accepting money from Kani and arranging for the necessary resources.

At one stage Kani had even included Kalmadi, currently residing in Jail number 4 to provide the logistics for the escape but later he was eased out from the plan. It is believed that the pole-vault that Kalmadi procured for prison break, at five times the market price, turned out to be of a very low quality and broke as soon as they tried to jump off in the trial escape.

A senior DMK leader, on condition of anonymity told Faking News, “Kalaignar is confident of pulling this off as much as he is confident of winning the next assembly elections. Besides, compared to the Scofield, Kalaignar has a larger surface area to offer for the tattoo. In fact we are even planning to use the extra area to add the route map of the Tihar Jail canteen where Kalaignar can have his favorite sambar rice and curd in the mid of escape if the glucose levels go down.”

Since the rescue-plan has already been leaked, Delhi police is under tremendous pressure to prevent the successful execution of the plan. Savdhaan Singh, senior inspector at the Tihar jail said, “All the security guards have been given a month leave to watch closely all the episodes of How I Met Your Mother.”

Later, it was found out that a little “oversight” on the part of jail intelligence agencies had caused this goof-up between the television series.

And just in case jail authorities succeed in watching the right series, there is a back-up plan.

“In event of failure, Appa has planned to come out with the truth and name all the big guns involved in the scam. The government could then be forced to ask Supreme Court, which is currently driving the CBI to probe the 2G scam, to stop interfering in the powers of the executive and let the law take its own course,” the DMK source revealed.

(reported by Ankur Nigam)