Friday, 15th December, 2017

Snippets

ISIS shows interest in developments in Uttar Pradesh, seeks videos of recent events

16, Jun 2015 By indianpsycho

Enchanted by the way cops in Uttar Pradesh burnt to death journalist Jagendra Singh for a Facebook post against Samajwadi Party MLA Ram Murti Verma, ISIS today appealed to them via email to make videos of the journalists that they torture and kill in future.

Arguing that it would be act as a good e-learning tutorial and ‘do it yourself’ video for their jihadists, ISIS urged SP govt in UP to help them out.

“We feel so small after having seen glimpses of how you tackled a journalist in your state. We are not ashamed in accepting that compared to you guys, we are amateurs and need to learn a lot. We have miles to go before we put another journalist to sleep,” read the email sent by ISIS to UP chief minister office, which Faking News accessed through Arnab Goswami’s sources.

Amateurish stuff from ISIS?
Amateurish stuff from ISIS?

“We can also have an exchange program later sometime, where we exchange journalists between us,” the mail further read.

When Faking News asked the ISIS caliph Abu Bakr-Al-Baghdadi if it was not a bit harsh on Uttar Pradesh government as they were not as brute and cruel as ISIS, Al Baghdadi tried to burn this reporter alive. But after we proved that we were fake journalist, he proudly conceded that ISIS was way more brute, but there were a lot of things to be learnt from the Samajwadi Party government.

“We need to be more sophisticated while dealing with these journos, can’t just simply behead them. We need to torture them with innovative stuff like pouring kerosene and burning them alive. This is where we feel Samajwadi Party’s experienced leaders can bring a lot to the table,” Baghdadi told Faking News.” We hope in SP’s fight to end communalism, they will help us out.”

“It would be icing on the cake if we are also taught by SP on how to manage bad press normally associated with killing journalists,” Baghdadi hoped.

“I mean isn’t it commendable that in a democratic country like India, how virtually no famous journalist who outrage at drop of a hat, completely ignored this incident,” he added,” Hats off to whosoever in SP is managing media.”