Friday, 22nd September, 2017

Snippets

Fearing low TRPs, BCCI postpones IPL-8 till AAP infighting stops

30, Mar 2015 By Shaitaan Khopdi ™

Mumbai: ‘Manoranjan ka Baap’ – IPL has met its real daddy, the Aam Aadmi Party. Internal fight among AAP cadres is driving the TRP’s of news channels so high that BCCI is considering postponing IPL-8 till either the political entertainment stops or viewers get bored of it and start demanding change.

According to the sources, it is the first time that IPL is feeling competition from any other source of entertainment. Neither Bollywood movies nor LS elections (2009/2014) ever posed any threat to IPL before.

Full on entertainment.
Full on entertainment.

“When the ruckus started in early March we thought that it will cover for a rather dull Cricket world cup and then by the time country gets ready for IPL, AAP will manage to douse the fire and people will shift focus on Cricket. But new stings just keep coming out of nowhere and neither News channels nor people are ready to give us any attention. If we don’t get any TRP there is no point conducting it,” explained a forever poker faced IPL chairman Rajiv Shukla.

“Does it mean IPL is losing its relevance in the fascist regime that is prevailing in the country lately?” Shaitaan Khopdi™ tried do a Sagarika Ghose, to which Rajiv Shukla replied, “IPL means entertainment. When there is enough of it available 24×7, why would people watch our matches that last only 4 hours?”

Shaitaan Khopdi™ argued, “But IPL’s main objective was to provide international exposure to domestic players and overall betterment of Cricket in India, BCCI should go ahead with the schedule without worrying about TRP.” However Shukla explained that it was just a ‘Jumla’ and should not be taken seriously.

Shukla was then asked, “Does BCCI have a plan if the AAP entertainment refuses to stop?”

“We have created a ‘Mauka’ type ad where we insert ‘Cricket’ in political news to remind people that they are supposed to watch IPL during March-April. This will be played during prime time Ad breaks on news channels in Ravi Shastri’s voice,” Shukla replied.

“It goes like this: Right at the start of ‘Power-Play’, AAP captain gets ‘Retired Hurt’ and goes Bangalore to get ‘Just what the doctor ordered’. Right then, experienced bowlers Yogendra Yadav and Prashant Bhushan overstep the line, giving Vice-captain Sisodia free-hits. He gladly hits both like ‘A tracer bullet’ for the ‘Yes Bank Maximum’. During the ‘Strategic Time out’ stump microphone picks up a conversation which exposes that AK rigged the auctions by trying to fix 6 players that were retained by Congress. Delhi immediately asks for a review against this ‘Karbonn Kamaal Catch’. Election Commission informs that Delhi has already lost their review on 7th Feb and next review will be available only in 2020,” Shukla revealed.