New Delhi. Congress has claimed that not only the statements dealing with the “youth” and “computer” factors – pioneered by Rahul Gandhi and Rajiv Gandhi respectively – but almost everything said by Narendra Modi at SRCC in Delhi University was borrowed from Congress.
In fact, sources tell Faking news that 10 Janpath, the residence of the Congress President Ms. Sonia Gandhi, was abuzz with unusual bonhomie and loud cheers contrary to the tremors expected from students’ response to Narendra Modi’s speech at Shri Ram College of Commerce (SRCC).
The Congress think tank had just presented before Sonia Ji, a rebuttal of all the high-flying and deep-sounding phrases used by Modi in his speech, where it has been claimed that all those terms either originally belong to Congress or are meaningless.
Here are the highlights:
P2G2: Congress has been an old practitioner of P2G2 i.e. “Progeny to Progeny, Gandhi to Gandhi” dictum of passing on the political power to the ‘Youth Icon’ of the country.
Speed, Skill & Scale: This model of looting the exchequer has already been perfected under the UPA rule. The Congress spokesperson thundered, “If any party can beat our scam record, either in Speed, Skill, or Scale, I will take sanyaas from politics!”
Fiber to Forex: Modi’s pitch for establishing value chain for the cotton growers came in for hearty laughter, especially from the well-travelled Congressmen. “Which international label uses cotton? Armani? Prada? I have cupboards full of these at home and none of it is made of cotton! Forex, my foot!”
Agriculture Production: All the Congress ruled states have already achieved peak agricultural productivity, so where is the question of a double-digit growth? Unless, of course, Center’s push for GM crops is supported by the Opposition and the activist vermin.
Water Table Rising: What does Gujarat want, annual floods like Assam and Bihar? People of Gujarat need to wake up while there’s still time. Imagine the deadly saline of Kutch flowing through the streets of Ahmedabad and Surat!
The Glass is Full: Once again, Narendra Modi had tried to steal an idea Congress and UPA had long perfected. While Modi said that the glass was half full of water and half full of air, Congress has always been fording ahead with its plan to loot the country dry and tell the people of India that the glass was still full!
Ms. Sonia Gandhi is reported to be delighted at the job well done. She has asked the Information & Broadcasting Minister Manish Tewary to issue the above rebuttal as an immediate press release titled “Blow to Modi.”