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Electrons feel inferior after observing "negative" stuff about Kejriwal

29, May 2014 By Pratik Purohit

New Delhi. After observing so much negative news in media and negative comments from people about Arvind Kejriwal, electrons (particles that carry negative charge) are feeling low and inferior. Several electrons from all over India were seen committing suicide by combining with positive charge.

After promise of negative post about electrons in Faking News, we managed to arrange meeting with an electron also known as Xuta among fellow electrons, protons and neutrons. In an exclusive interview with us, Xuta said while revolving around the nucleus, “We were in delusion that we are the most negative charged thing, until my friend who is living in Uranium atom overheard conversation between two scientists who were accusing Kejriwal of carrying negative charges.”

Atoms fighting after accusing Kejriwal to stop monopoly of electrons.
Atoms fighting after accusing Kejriwal of trying to stop the monopoly of electrons.

“My friend shared this information when my parent atom donated me to his atom during process of ionization,” added the cute little electron.

Xuta wondered how could as 40-something years old person was taking all the limelight about being negative when electrons had always been there, rotating around nucleus since god crafted the universe. He claimed that this was the first ever crisis that electrons faced in their lifetime.

“My best friend Cuta, who rotates in an atom, which is a part of an Ethernet cable, told me that there was significant flow of negative charged data about Kejriwal, which is both incoming and outgoing. Few of my friends, who live in air conditioned news channel studios, also had similar instances to share,” said a visibly worried Xuta.

“There are exceptions, like I had a friend rotating in an atom, which is part of a cap (topi), who heard only positive things about Kejriwal, but I ignored him as he was the only one who held that belief,” said the confused and surprised electron.

When Faking News reporter asked Xuta about his views on Arvind Kejriwal, he said, “I don’t know who this Arvind Kejriwal is, but he must be the biggest problem of India, more than anything else. That’s why Indians are criticizing and talking about him so intensely.”