Tuesday, 19th September, 2017

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Congress switches stance, says allow subsidized food in canteen or we won’t let Parliament work

25, Jul 2015 By Shaitaan Khopdi ™

New Delhi: Rahul Gandhi’s claim of reducing PM’s 56 inch chest into 5.6 inch turned out to be a dud when External Affairs Minister Sushma Swaraj refused to bow down to pressure. As she threatened to expose a Congress leader for seeking diplomatic passport for a coal scam accused, an embarrassed Congress quickly postponed the much publicized ‘Silent Protest’ and went back to the drawing board.

Deserted by its UPA-I and UPA-II allies on parliament disruption issue, Congress is looking for a solid cause that can unite the secular parties inside the lower house. They have finally found a topic that touches cords with all its allies – Subsidized food in parliament canteen. Congress VP Rahul Gandhi has asserted that they will not let the parliament function unless PM promises that subsidy on canteen food will continue.

An angry Rahul tearing away current menu of parliament canteen.
An angry Rahul tearing away current menu of parliament canteen.

Last week after huge uproar in social platforms and some online petitions, BJD MP Jay Panda wrote a letter requesting LS speaker to renounce the subsidy on food items. Initially everyone thought that this is another ‘brownie-point’ gathering exercise by Mr. Panda and soon people will forget about it. But as monsoon session drew near, they realized that shit has got real and something needs to be done.

Rahul Gandhi got twinkle in his eyes and dimple in his cheeks as he wasted no time in calling a press conference.

“Hume to pehle hi pata tha ki ye aadmi na khayega aur na khane dega. Aur bhaiya jaha tak khane ki baat hai, 67 saal me Congress ne kabhi bhi kisi ko nahi roka,” said Rahul Gandhi in a stern voice. While his party men started cheering, he was just unstoppable and went on offensive. He mocked PM for being silent.

“It is better for me and my party that Narendra Modi is silent,” Rahul Gandhi roared. “Err…Rahul Baba, other way round is also true. It’s better for Congress when you remain silent. You spoke in 2014 and we saw what happened,” said Shashi Tharoor who has still not finished responding to each individual praises he got on twitter for his excellent speech in Oxford reunion.

At the time of publishing this news, our correspondent Shaitaan Khopdi™ informed Sonia Gandhi was giving a dressing down to Tharoor for speaking out of turn, “You always do this; it’s become a habit with you.”