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Brazil requests Rahul Gandhi to teach them how to smile when things are totally screwed up

09, Jul 2014 By idiot420

New Delhi. With Brazilian football players and fans crying and sobbing inconsolably after Germany thrashed Brazil 7-1 in the World Cup semi-final, experts have warned of a possible mass depression across the country. Therefore as a precautionary step, Brazil government has requested Rahul Gandhi to come and teach Brazilians how to smile in such adverse times.

Name of Rahul Gandhi was suggested by a member of Brazilian Embassy in Delhi, who had earlier witnessed Congress Vice President smiling at the press conference after Congress was defeated in a similar manner on 16th of May.

Rahul Gandhi
Because winning and losing are just states of mind.

“We urgently needed some help, as our efforts to control mass mourning have failed. The level of shock is so high that Brazilians are not in a condition to work or do anything for at least a month, which could be very harmful for not only for our economy, but for people too. We want them to recover as fast as possible, and we believe that Shri Rahul Gandhi would help us out,” hope Brazilian Ambassador to India, Mr Carlos Sergio.

Buoyed by the faith Brazil government has shown in him, Rahul Gandhi has immediately accepted the offer and is reported to be on his way to Rio de Janeiro.

“He anyway loves going abroad,” a source confirmed to Faking News.

Before leaving India, in a short message to his party members and his die-hard fans, Rahul reiterated his core ideology of serving poor and marginalized people. He further claimed that Congress will help poor people in all developing economies, whether India or Brazil. He also promised RTI and Women Empowerment for Brazil.

Meanwhile Brazil government has started the groundwork. They are promoting Rahul Gandhi’s arrival as arrival of a saint from east.

“As soon as he lands, he will address a massive rally in the capital and explain to Brazilians that victory or loss was just a state of mind,” a source disclosed.

“He will tour across Brazil and will be addressing gatherings in different cities, recounting stories of those times when Brazil won the world cup and defeated Germany in different matches,” the source further revealed Rahul’s grand plan for Brazilian revival.

Back home, Congress party has welcomed Brazil’s move, and once again hailed the charismatic leader.

“He is a world class leader and his importance is at the global level, not some chailwala who is limited to local level politics,” said a visibly happy Congress leader Mani Shankar Aiyar.