New Delhi. “Adam and Eve, first humans of the universe were agents of BJP,” claimed Aam Aadmi Party convener Mr. Arvind Kejriwal while he was addressing reporters at a press briefing in connection with the forthcoming assembly elections in Delhi. They could also be agents of Ambani, he added for good measure.
The reporters were shocked by his startling claim and pointed out to the impossibility of this eventuality, but Arvind Kejriwal insisted that his claim was backed by evidence. He went on to present the evidence.
“Adam and Eve did not belong to Garden of Eden, they did not establish it or nurture it. They did not give their blood and sweat for making it grow big and green. They were just para-dropped into this garden against the wishes of other animals. Now, all of us know that this, para-dropping of leaders happens in BJP only. It is BJP which promotes such VIP culture. They had no respect for other animals just like they don’t have any respect for aam aadmi today.”
“Second proof lies in the apple. Can you tell me, in this period of high inflation, when an aam aadmi cannot even afford potatos and tomatoes, how were Adam and Eve eating an apple? How is this possible without having black money? Something is wrong, somewhere! Someone has taken a bribe, a lot of it!”
“Third piece of evidence is in the fact that while God severely punished the serpent and let Adam & Eve off lightly. This is the proof that all, including judiciary at that time were involved in this game of looting the poor. You would remember how I was jailed for a week because I called Gadkari corrupt. Now tell me, in which government’s rule the corrupt roam around in luxury cars and those who protest against corruption go to jail? Such situation can only happen when BJP are in government.”
“Fourth proof is that the offspring of Adam & Eve were two in number, called Cain and Abel. Is it a coincidence that Ambanis brothers too are two in number? This clearly establishes the connection of Ambanis with Adam and Eve.”
“We are getting more evidence of BJP’s involvement in tempting Adam and Eve on the path of sin. We have received information that the serpent was Amit Shah’s agent and his punishment was only a drama. A BJP leader who does not like the corruption in his party has agreed to provide us the video of the meeting between Amit Shah and the serpent. We would expose BJP completely.”
With this Mr. Kejriwal concluded the press briefing. The reporters did not ask any questions as they had been informed about Mr. Kejriwal’s aversion to anyone else asking questions.