Mumbai: India’s most famous news channel Times Bow, has kidnapped a fresh criminal from police custody. Breaking News from the same channel revealed that they had kidnapped the criminal to get the latest info about crime, direct from his mouth.
Mumbai had been witnessing spate of crimes for the past few weeks. After a good chase of the criminal, police had rounded up a suspect, who operates by the name of Joker. The criminal had his face painted in different colors to evade CCTV cameras.
Upon his capture yesterday, police spokesperson had said, “We caught him while he tried to escape after his failed attempt to murder a banker and loot a bank. We are yet to investigate his motives and the groups involved in these crimes.”
While Police was bringing Joker to court, a group of masked men in a SUV distracted the police force and kidnapped Joker. Within hours of abduction, Joker appeared in Times Bow studio along with its chief news breaker Urnab.
With his trademark howl and camera zoomed to his face, Urnab shouted, “Right now, in your TV screens, you are seeing the notorious criminal of Mumbai – The Joker. As per our initial investigation, which later leaked to Police, Joker had committed three counts of murder and nine counts of theft. We are the first to break this news. Times Bow, the number one channel of the world news arena is the first to break this news to you. We will telecast the investigation live. Do not just swallow that BP tablet, instead take your smartphone and start tweeting using the hashtag #JokerOnTimesBow.”
A highly placed source from Times Bow, appraised this decision by Urnab.
He said, “Tough times needs tough actions. We have to bring interest in our news to people. And then, there is this social media, which breaks news even faster than us. These idiotic sources first tweet about the latest scoops from such crime cases, rather than passing such info to us. It is getting tiring trying to compete with them. So, the decision to kidnap the source for sources, that is, the criminals themselves and get the investigation done in news studio is the only way we can stay relevant. Moreover, it clears the doubts we have over the investigating agencies, when we ourselves do the investigation.”
As soon as the news of Joker being kidnapped by a news channel broke out, several others news channels took the cue and started abducting criminals belonging to various cases that had drawn the attention of public recently.