Monday, 25th September, 2017

Snippets

As Mangalyaan attains celebrity status, Times of India to send a spacecraft to take its hot pics

25, Sep 2014 By idiot420

Delhi. After realizing that Mangalyaan has attained celebrity status in India, leading daily Times of India has decided to send a spacecraft in outer space to take hot pics of ISRO’s Mars orbiter.

TOI, which is committed to serve the nation in its own way, zeroed upon this decision in a late night emergency meeting at its headquarters.

mangalyaan-probe
As per TOI, public is bored of seeing typical Mangalyaan pics.

“We are amazed by the way common Indians are going gaga over the Mars orbiter. It was then I thought, dude, we need to do something. People want to know more about Mangalyaan and want to see more of it. And being the industry leader, it’s our duty to show them what they want to see,” said Vicky Goyal, a senior TOI executive, who initially proposed this idea of sending the spacecraft, “We can’t let our countrymen down.”

After much brainstorming, TOI management has even thought of a name for it.

“It will be called Paparazziyaan and its sole duty will be to get hot pics of famous satellites and other things roaming around in outer space,” Vicky Goyal further revealed, adding that Paparazziyaan is TOI’s most ambitious project till date.

“We have never spend so much energy and resources to get sensational and revealing pics of any celebrity. But Mangalyaan is special for us, we will do whatever it takes,” Mr. Goyal concluded.

Reportedly, before deciding to start their own project, TOI authorities had contacted NASA to rent Hubble Space Telescope for a month. But, things didn’t work out, as TOI was asking for pictures of Mangalyaan from only specific angles.

“Who wants to see normal pics of a celebrity? So we thought, better to go ahead with our own project,” marketing head of the newspaper told Faking News. “We want to show the world inner beauty of Mangalyaan.”

With a dedicated spacecraft of its own, TOI is targeting to get revealing pics of not only Mangalyaan but of aliens too.

“In case of any possible encounter with aliens in outer space, Paparazziyaan will click their pics too. Just imagine, TOI will become first news daily to show aliens’ hot pics,” hoped head of TOI group.

Meanwhile, company’s senior management is in talks with sponsors who have agreed to partly finance the project after TOI promised to place their ads on the outer body of Paparazziyaan.