New Delhi. After allocating Rs.3000 crores for VVPAT (machines with Voter-Verified Paper Audit Trail) , the government said the machine will print an Audit trail of votes and also a zodiac prediction of the day, for the voter, based on his/her date of birth.
“VVPAT is specially designed to make sure it is tamper-proof. The paper it prints out is waterproof and also thorn-proof. The additional feature, the prediction it makes is simply a proof that centre and the Election Commission are very serious about executing the business of selecting democracy in our country,” an EC official told Faking News.
“We had a test run of the VVPAT machines and the results were hilarious! When an EC official voted, the prediction said: Avoid unnecessary debate; When a candidate voted, it said: This is the not good day for investment. For another candidate, it said: Some bad news might disappoint you. For a farmer, it said: This is good time for suicide; For a voter who accepted cash for voting, it said: You will feel joy and enthusiasm, today,” the EC official explained the testing process of the new VVPAT machine.
When Faking News asked whether it is tamper-proof, he said, “Listen! First of all, explain what is tamper-proof! The entire system is tampered. People vote for symbols and not for candidates; People vote for cash and not for ideology; Candidates contest to make money and not do service; Candidates contest to gain power and not to do public work; The country, as a whole, considers an election as an entertainment and not as an exercise for nation building! Everything is tampered.”
Faking News reporter wrapped up the discussion on VVPAT machines, having not received a decisive reply on whether it is tamper-proof or not! As a parting gift, the reporter also was allowed to test the new VVPAT machine and received the following prediction: You will feel unbiased and show no prejudice today!