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The secret to my new world record is 'Patanjali Sport Shoes': Usain Bolt

26, Nov 2015 By alien4dec

Uttarakhand:  The 100 meter world record holder Usain Bolt, yet again broke his own title as the world’s fastest man alive by winning the 100 meter race in a record breaking 4.24 seconds, thrilling sports event at PWC (Patanjali World Championships) in Uttarakhand.

Brand Ambassador for Patanjali shoes
Brand Ambassador for Patanjali shoes

Today, in an exclusive interview with Faking News, Bolt revealed his secret to this new world record. He stated, “I purchased many shoes online and offline, practiced wholeheartedly but never achieved so much success, until I met Yogi Baba Ramdev. He gifted me a pair of patanjali sport shoes and shared the secret formula too. While running, I just have to chant the mantras, “Just Speed It” and see I did it.

At the official media launch of “Patanjali Sport Shoes”, Yogi Acharya Balkrishan told, “This is just the beginning, we had distributed patanjali sports shoes to few prominent members as a part of our R & D trials and the results were incredible.”

Patanjali Sports Shoe is synonyms with Speed. Shri. Narendra Modi was our first trial customer and look at the speedy results, by November 2015, he has made more than thirty foreign trips and in a spree to make a world tour record as the PM of India.

He further added, “This is an innovative product and most distinguished feature of this shoe is, it is eco-friendly and releases ‘Oxygen’ from shoes with every step. Baba Ramdev shall be awarded the prestigious Nobel Prize next year for his innovative green shoes.”

Electricity crunch is another major concern in villages. To combat this issue we have launched the rural version with a ‘Solar Torch’ at the toe cap of the shoes.

We have received enormous pre-orders online from various shopping sites for the upcoming Mumbai Marathons and other sporting events. Yogi Balkrishan was super excited in disclosing that the ‘Golden Boot’ has been rechristened to ‘Patanjali Golden Khadau’ which shall be awarded to the top goal scorer in the FIFA World Cup.

Charlie Sheen is yet another fan of Patanjali Sport Shoes, who used them for ‘Speed Dating’ and look at the exceptional results, he dated more than 5000 women world-wide. He further added, It also comes with a Patanjali Running App which can be connected anytime, anywhere, with smartphones to receive  alerts on various patanjali diet and healthy food products.

Meanwhile, Social Media Geeks went viral and have renamed the shoes as ‘Bolt Shoes’ whereas some environmental agencies call it as ‘Green Speed Shoes’.

Many Mothers expressed their happiness after using these shoes during the trial events, as this has benefitted them a lot and they can now run cheetah speed to catch and feed their kids who run away from them with the fear of glass of milk.

Ministry of Defense have also ordered the Patanjali shoes for their armed forces to catch the terrorists quickly. Air India today revealed its plans to distribute these shoes to their pilots, so that the flights can run on time and customers are satisfied.

Along with Mumbai Dabbawalas, Mumbai Local Train travelers were also seen excited about this speedy shoes, which they are hoping to help them catch the Mumbai local trains on time.