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Supreme Court allows ASI to dig into Khap leaders' brains

14, Aug 2013 By deepkamal

New Delhi. The Archaeological Survey of India (ASI) has been given permission by the Supreme Court to dig into Khap Panchayat leaders’ brains. Earlier this year, ASI had launched a campaign to study the brains of Khap leaders residing in the National Capital Region and in 146 other villages in Haryana, Rajasthan and Uttar Pradesh.

Explaining the motives, an ASI official had then said, “Thought process and social approach of Khaps are very much primitive and we greatly expect to find remains of some lost civilization if we are permitted to explore.”

Human Skull
Contrary to popular beliefs, the brain is expected to be there.

When asked if the digging will be helpful for historians, ASI official replied in an instant, “Absolutely, recent series of evidences support our assumptions; after every rape and molestation incident when whole nation hides its face out of shame, these Khap leaders come up with historical diktats and mandates related to matters like girls and mobiles, girls wearing Jeans, working hours for girls, and many other such rulings. Something ancient is still alive.”

“It remains a modern mystery how living organism in today’s era can have such ancient thought process that dates beyond the birth of Raja Ram Mohan Roy and LK Advani,” the official added.

After digging into Khaps’ brains, ASI is expecting to establish missing link between the ancient India and modern Pakistan, along with many other historically significant artifacts from Indian subcontinent lost centuries ago.

ASI is also in discussion with UNO to declare Khap’s brain a World Heritage Site.

The Supreme Court ruling is however a major setback for Sewage Treatment Authority of India (STAI) as they had originally opposed ASI’s petition from digging into Khap leaders’ brains.

“This is very unfortunate for environment, ASI is not able to understand the damage it will cause to the nature. It’s the sewage accumulated in Khap brains from centuries old thinking, which is being misunderstood as historical heritage. They will find nothing but garbage and then we will have to do tedious work of cleanup to ensure health and hygiene,” an STAI official pointed out the dangers.

However, ASI is adamant and is assessing whether to go ahead and request permission for digging into the brains of some other renowned persons including Imams of Deoband and some ancient senior leaders in VHP, RSS, Shiv Sena, and MNS.