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Man with hurt sentiments refuses first aid

01, Feb 2013 By Pagal Patrakar

Chennai. A 37-year-old man, who claimed that he was deeply pained as his sentiments were hurt due to movie he had not seen, refused to take any medical assistance to assuage his pain.

“What crap! I’m not sick!” claimed a sentimental Irfan, who has been protesting against Kamal Haasan’s movie Vishwaroopam for the last two weeks, calling it anti-Islamic.

Irfan reiterated that his sentiments were hurt, but he asserted that no medical help was needed. Some friends of Irfan had brought him to a local hospital as soon as he complained of hurt sentiments.

Kamal Hassan
Irfan claimed that Kamal Haasan was mocking him and his sentiments through this gesture

“Yes, it pains, but it’s not a medical condition. It’s a psychological condition,” he claimed.

Then shouldn’t he see a psychiatrist in that case, Faking News wondered; however this reporter didn’t ask the question as it could have hurt his sentiments even more.

Doctors were not sure how to treat Irfan as they couldn’t ascertain how he was inflicted with pain. “It appears that he feels pain directly through his heart, as we couldn’t see any signals going through or originating from his brain,” Dr. Ahmed confirmed.

“No comments,” Dr. Ahmed said when asked if the diagnosis hinted towards absence of any brain in Irfan’s body.

Irfan, however, asserted that everything was “normal” about him even though his sentiments were hurt unlike most others in the country.

“People like Kamal Haasan are abnormal,” he claimed, “Why can’t he make normal movies like Race-2, Housefull-2, or Murder-2? He needs treatment, not me!”

When asked what would he do if Kamal Haasan continued to make movies like Vishwaroopam, which hurts his sentiments.

“I have to hurt him in that case,” he candidly admitted.

Faking News ended the interview straightaway after this, while doctors were amused to hear this special version of “shock therapy” where the therapy was given to someone other than the patient.