Tuesday, 24th October, 2017

Snippets

Govt cracks down on Gau Rakshaks, says ‘will train cows in Kung Fu for self defence’

08, Aug 2016 By @jurnoleast

After PM Modi’s strong message and call for action against ‘Gau Rakshaks’, Govt. is now taking proactive measures to ensure that cow related incidents leading to violence are brought under control and has announced that all cows in the country will be trained in martial arts for self defence.

No more 'Cow Vigilantism'. Cows can defend themselves now.
No more ‘Cow Vigilantism’. Cows can defend themselves now.

Speaking to Faking News a senior official from PMO said, “Modiji is very angry with these cow vigilante’s. You may have heard his speech and how he said these anti-social elements will have to be dealt with strongly. We are asking respective state Govt’s to take necessary action against such people.”

“At the same time we feel that cows need to learn to defend themselves. That is the only way they can feel secure till the elections are over,” he added

When questioned about what measures is the Govt taking in making cows less vulnerable and able to defend themselves, the official said that Kung Fu experts from China have been asked to assist.

“If they can train a Panda in Kung Fu, they can definitely train our cows. We have asked renowned Kung Fu expert Keh Kay Lee to train Indian cows in self defence,” he added

Our reporter visited one such training session where a few cows were already learning martial arts moves.

Meanwhile, Congress has dubbed this as farce and Vice-President Rahul Gandhi is expected to visit a ‘Gau Sammelan’ to express his solidarity.

Video showing a training session in progress