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Chats protest demanding quota in South Indian restaurants

26, Feb 2016 By electroman

Delhi: Chats have started violent agitations in North India demanding quota reservation in South Indian Restaurants. Chats were seen throwing stale Pani Puris on the riot police. Chats also derailed a train by placing Papdi Chat on the rails. The leader of this agitation Hardik Chat from the Chatidar community has promised the Chats that they will get the reservation from the current government.

Golgappe in rasam. Sabka saath, sabka vikas
Golgappe in rasam. Sabka saath, sabka vikas

The chats also dumped leftover pani from last week in the Munak Canal, thus sabotaging Delhi’s water supply. The Chats will be organising a Chatidar Kranti Diwas and will march towards the parliament. Some netas are expecting free Chats along with subsidised food that day. There was also information about an incident involving a Pani puri and a fat man. The pani puri lodged itself in his throat refusing to go down or come out, thus killing him by asphyxiation. By far this was the only casualty reported from the violent protests.

The main complaint raised by the Chat community is that the hotels are serving South Indian items like Idli, Dosa etc in North India, but South Indian hotels are not having these Chat items on their regular menu. This is a case of racial discrimination. So they want the Government to allot 40% of the South Indian menus for Chats.

The government is planning to file sedition case against the Chat leader for shouting anti-national slogans during the protest. The prime minister commented that Mother India has lost a great food item after downing a full plate of Masala Puri in a college ceremony.

On seeing this agitation gain popularity, Cats have also taken to the streets demanding reservation in homes. Since most people prefer Dogs over cats, because they consider cats as evil. The Cats demand from Dogs 50:50 sharing of humans in India. It is soon expected that Bats, Plants, Trans-Fats etc are also going to agitate demanding quotas.