Mumbai. Mr. and Mrs. Navelkar have sued national television broadcaster UTV Bindass for having turned their normal looking son into a complete asshole. 15 years old Pratyush, now a six months old asshole, is their only child, whom Navelkars had been trying to raise as a normal human being, but last week the couple realized that their son had acquired attributes that were hallmarks of unadulterated assholes.
“He was alright just a few months back,” Prakash Navelkar, father of Pratyush said, “but last week when I asked him why he got bad grades in mathematics, he told me to take a chill pill without even looking at me. He would never speak to me like that.”
Prakash’s worst fears were confirmed when Pratyush was suspended for three days from his school the following day for having called his class teacher a “fat ass” while arguing for grades.
“Our son had grown into an asshole,” said a dejected Prakash, who further informed that Pratyush had later updated his Facebook status about his “three day holiday” that was liked by at least seven other suspected assholes.
Pratyush had added his father last month on Facebook and listed him as “cool buddies”, Prakash later found out.
“Initially we were shocked and couldn’t eat that night,” Vineeta Navelkar, mother of Pratyush recalled, “the next few days we carefully noticed his activities and found that he was hooked on to television, especially this channel called Bindass.”
After having watched a few programs like Dadagiri, Big Switch, and Emotional Attyachaar, parents of Pratyush were convinced that nothing and no one else but the television channel had turned their promising son into a hopeless asshole.
“I don’t know what will he do when he grows up,” said a visibly upset and concerned Prakash, “I hope these insurance companies come up with some scheme to secure future of our kids who have been rendered assholes for their lives.”
Deeply hurt by the worrisome transformation of their son, Prakash and Vineeta have served the television channel a legal notice and are seeking damages for having destroyed the personality, employability, sensibility, and “reality” of their son.
UTV Bindass has not yet responded to the legal notice, but sources inform that the television channel is thinking of starting a new reality show where they would showcase the “adventures” of those school children who have been suspended from schools for having abused their teachers.