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Man in love with world cinema refuses to eat Indian food

20, Sep 2009 By Pagal Patrakar

Mumbai. Saurabh Antaryami, the 28-year-old self-styled movie critic, has fallen in inescapable love with world cinema. Saurabh, who has been watching only world cinema for over nine months now, has now decided to stop eating Indian food altogether and has instead asked his wife to cook Greek, Thai, Moroccan, Mexican, Chinese, Persian or Russian food for him on each day of the week. Saurabh believes that he would be able to appreciate world cinema better this way.

A poster in Saurabh's bedroom
A poster in Saurabh's bedroom

“Indians are too narrow minded and happy in their own cocoon, but I want to open up my thinking and understand the outside world in the best possible manner. There is no better way to understand a society than to watch their cinema. I started with that long ago but now I realize that it’s time to upgrade myself further. I know many guys are jealous of me, but that’s the great Indian crab way, we just try to pull each other down and don’t allow anyone to progress.” Saurabh said.

Saurabh had earlier faced ridicule when he wore a Hawaiian shirt with a Thai hat to his school get-together party. Neighbors say that his wife had recently fought with him as he wanted her to wear a Sarong during Ganesh Chaturthi. Neighbors had also complained to police on a couple of occasions when Saurabh played world music on full volume in the middle of night.

“My neighbors are jealous jerks. How can someone be so idiotic not to appreciate that world clocks show different times? I was playing music as per Central European Time. Morons! They would never be able to rise from their ghetto.” Saurabh expressed his displeasure.

Friends inform that Saurabh was not always so fond of world cinema, in fact he hardly even watched Bollywood cinema at times.

“We used to think he didn’t like watching cinema, but one day we saw him coming out of a theatre where this cheap movie called manchali padosan (flirtatious local girl) was playing. It was a year back or so and we made so much fun of him that he stopped talking to us. Later on he’d just talk about world cinema to us and then we stopped talking to him. He has lost it man.” Vijay, one of the college friends of Saurabh said.