Saturday, 23rd September, 2017

Snippets

When a judge felt like giving a Kick to Salman Khan

30, Jul 2014 By Vipul K Rawal

The poaching case against Salman Khan has been running for almost 14 years now. Sources tell Faking News that the court has not been able to reach any conclusion because Salman Khan has confused them with his arguments. Here is one such incident of what happened during a hearing:

Salman
No, he is not killing a Black Buck.

Judge (reading the police report and asking mildly) : So let me understand this, you first shot down a Chinkara, an endangered species, and when it was on the verge of dying, one of you knelt down beside it and slit it’s throat with a knife? I cant understand this behavior.

Salman : Mujhe samajhne ki koshish mat karna. Main dil mein aata hoon, samajh mein nahi.

Judge (angrily, as if he has been kicked) : I don’t want you to come into my heart, I want to know why you did it?

Salman : Because I had promised Tabu, Neelam, and Sonali that before the shooting for the film is over, I would kill a brute beast, ek khoonkhaar jaanvar ka game bajaunga, and gift them. aur ek baar jab maine commitment kar di, phir mai apne aap ki bhi nahi sunta.

Judge (totally irritated) : Chinkara is a wild beast? A khoonkhaar jaanvar? Obviously you live in a different world and you are unable to understand the gravity of the situation. Why don’t you take some medicines and meet me again after a month or so. I will postpone the hearing as a favor to you.

Salman : Mujpe ek ehsaan karna, ki mujpe koi ehsaan na karna.

Judge (gently) : Son, I think you need serious help. I am going to ask you a few general knowledge questions to determine your IQ. Who is the Vice President of our country?

Salman (instantly) : Hamid Karzai. kya?

Judge : I am sorry, I underestimated you.

Salman : Judge Saheb, pyaar me no sorry, no thank you. Aur zindagi me teen cheeze kabhi underestimate mat karna; I, Me, aur Myself.

Judge : Dekho, main tumhe pyar nahi karta, I just …

Salman (emotionally) : Saari duniya pyaar mein padi hui hai… sirf ek mujhe hi haq nahi hai ki main kisi se pyaar kar sakun? Koi mujhse pyaar kar sake… kyon?

By this time, the judge too got emotional. He decides to postpone the hearing for the next 3 months.

Once outside the courtroom, Salmaan was greeted by Sajid Nadiadwaala and they both were found laughing hysterically. They laughed all the way to the bank, sources say.