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Indian army locates secret hideout of Himesh Reshammiya

17, May 2011 By Pagal Patrakar

Mumbai. After full four years since he launched his lethal “Aap Kaa Surroor – The Moviee – The Real Luv Story” on unsuspecting and unarmed citizens, Indian army claims to have located the secret hideout of Himesh Reshammiya. Army could conduct a live raid anytime and capture the maverick artist along with his weapons of mass destruction stashed in his hideout, a defense ministry official confirmed to Faking News.

“Unlike the Osama operation by US, this will not be a kill-or-capture operation,” Tanu Malik, an under-secretary in Minister of Defense said, “Although he is wanted for his excesses on Indian citizens, we want to capture him alive and use him as a tool against the Pakistani military and terrorist establishment.”

Himesh Reshammiya
A file photo of Himesh that has been issued by the Defense Ministry

As per the defense ministry plans, Himesh would be captured and made to sing “Ek baar aaja aajaa aaja aaja aa-aa-aa-aaja”, which will then be beamed into terror camps running in Pakistan with help of flying loudspeakers fitted with stealth technology. Ministry feels that the step could force the terrorists to cross over into India, after which they can be arrested or killed by the army.

Although there is no precedent of such an operation, ministry officials believe this will work.

“I don’t think we need any hi-fi operation like what US did in Abbottabad. In fact, US should have tried unleashing Justin Bieber or Rebecca Black on Osama and the operation would have been equally effective,” Malik said.

The hideout of Himesh is reported to be somewhere in Mumbai that doubles up as the headquarters of his recently formed organization HR Musik, which is not yet on the list of banned organizations by any government, though experts believe that the situation could change soon.

“Himesh is all set to make his debut in Hollywood; this could force the international community to take some pre-emptive steps,” an expert said.