Sunday, 19th November, 2017

Snippets

Even Bahubali fails to get good appraisal from HR, read the interview

18, Jul 2015 By Rajesh Turlapati

Reviewer(RR): Hello. My name is Critic Rao. I am your HR manager. I am going to review your appraisal, though I have neither seen your work nor I understand anything about it. I am like the guy who posts review in Facebook by seeing only trailer in Youtube.

A visibly upset Babhubali, after he saw his appraisal rating.
A visibly upset Babhubali, after he saw his appraisal rating.

Bahubali(BB): Hi, I am Mahendra Bahubali, Son of Amarendra Bahubali, Grandson of Vijayendra Bahubali, Grand-Grandson of Rajendra Bahubali, Grand-Grand-Grand Son of…

Reviewer(RR): Stop it, I dont care who your Great-Grand-Grandfather is. This sounds like a lengthy introduction, I will cut another star in your rating. Okay, here is your rating, you get 3 stars you have not reached our expectations, and you need improvement.

Bahubali(BB): What! Did you actually see my work?

RR: I have done 600 reviews this year; have never seen anybody’s work. If I keep watching other’s works, who will do my work?

BB: Okay, can you at least tell me what’s wrong with my work?

RR:  Well, Your work is not up to mark.

BB: Upto what mark?

RR: Who knows? Oops, I mean developers in other companies are performing at high standards. Your work is not up to the standards.

BB: what companies?

RR: Google, Apple etc.

BB: But ours is not Apple. This is ‘Pine Apple’ company with very low budgets assigned to projects.

RR: Am not talking about budgets, don’t change the topic

BB: Okay, Did you see the visual effects in my program?

RR: Yes, Have seen some in trailer and they are copied from other foreign projects like 300, and ‘Lord of the rings’.

BB: Trailer!! Are you sure you haven’t actually seen trailers of 300 and ‘Lord of the rings’.

RR: Of course I am sure. How dare you to ask me that. And, you know how our company ‘Pine Apple’ is against copying (Copyright infringement). We believe in originality.

BB: That’s good. May I ask why our company is named ‘Pine Apple’ with a logo almost similar to that of Apple’s?

RR: That is because, we are inspired from Apple. But, yours is complete copy.

BB: Okay, can you tell similarities between 300 and my work?

RR: Oh, That’s easy. Both have used swords and have war in it.

BB: Now you sound worse than BallalaDeva.

RR: I don’t know who Ballaladeva is, but that old guy Mahabharata also copied everything from Lord of the rings. That part, where Krishna helps Arjuna with all his magic is complete copy from Lord of the rings where Gandalf helps Hobbits.

BB: What! You are saying Mahabharata is copied from ‘Lord of the rings’?

RR: Yes, I have actually given 1 star to Mahabharata. You should feel happy with 3 stars.

BB: Wait a sec, Are you the one who gave 5 stars to ‘Happy New Year’ and ‘Dabang 2’ ?

RR: Oh yes that’s me. You should know that we use different techniques and methodologies to give ratings. For example, in your case We used LD (Lucky Draw) methodology and RR (Random Review) technique. Both are very popular and most used techniques, in case if you need any more information on the methods, Oh wait, what are you doing? You are not supposed to attend calls in this meeting.

BB: I just got a call from Apple.  I am flying to US tomorrow. Good Bye and Jai Mahismati.