Friday, 28th July, 2017
Snippets

A page from the jail diary of Sanjay Dutt

31, Jul 2013 By idiot420

Faking News has exclusively accessed a page of Sanjay Dutt’s diary that he’s writing in Yerwada Central Jail in Pune. We got it after paying 5000 rupees bribe, but are reproducing here for free:

Sanjay Dutt
Sanjay Dutt in a pensive mood

Woke up at 6:30 in morning and started the day with The Times of India. Front page story says “At 66, Mother India gets ready for her 29th baby.”

I turned emotional reading this. It was closely related to two events – Mother India, a role that my mother played, and Hyderabad, the city shown in my last movie Policegiri.

I tried to regain my composure by reading other news on the front page. There was news about Taliban attacking jail and freeing 300 prisoners, but it was in Pakistan, not Pune. Felt trolled.

There was also news on rupee falling further against US Dollar, which reminded me of Munnabhai Chale America.

I threw away the newspaper and proceeded to have breakfast.

You know, breakfast without knives and forks ends faster than expected. Now habituated of this, and enjoying. It’s not that bad as once pointed by Oprah Winfrey.

My day job is of making paper bags. I picked up the depressing newspaper and made bags out of it. Felt relieved.

But I don’t know why do they want me to make these bags. These guys can earn if they make me make faces. I mean, they can invite visitors and charge for clicking pictures with me. Rs.50 for a photo with sad-faced Sanju Baba and Rs.500 for a photo with smiling Sanju Baba, extra Rs. 50 for wrapping my arm around visitor’s shoulders.

I am yet to hear back on this proposal given to them. So another day of paper bag making.

I also met a new inmate, Raghu is his name, no, not that MTV Roadies guy. He is here in a hit-and-run case. No, he’s not a Salman Khan fan as well. He’s a fan of SRK and is feeling bad that he would miss Chennai Express. Felt a bit jealous of SRK. He could get all this fame without going to jail.

Had a simple lunch and went back to making paper bags. Who uses them in this rainy season?!

In the evening, read a few pages from “Manmohan Singh’s Speeches : Volume III”. Not joking! Got it from the jail library.

Somehow Manmohan Singh reminded me of not being free and being chained. This thought has troubled me for long. In fact, I’m having dreams of The Shawshank Redemption.

But I’ve no such plans of jailbreak. Just a couple of years more, and who knows, maybe Justice Katju’s letters could work.