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Monthly EMIs declared best employee of the year by HRs

03, Sep 2015 By indianpsycho

Mumbai. In a unanimous decision taken by HR professionals across industries, monthly EMIs paid by employees were declared the best employees of the year.

It is for the first time a non-human entity was chosen for this award that too by HRs cutting across all companies.

“These EMIs may not be humane, but they have this great quality of not letting any employee leave his seat howsoever unhappy he maybe with his job, boss, salary, work environment, quality of female colleagues, coffee machines, water err I mean daal served in cafeteria, etc,” explained HR head of a leading IT company, while handing over a bouquet to monthly EMI statements of his employees.

Thing that holds unsatisfied employee back
Thing that holds unsatisfied employee back

Further to this these EMIs bring out the best from the employees.

“When they know they have EMIs to pay, they also know they can’t afford to lose their jobs and hence do the best possible work in order to not get laid-off,” he added.

HR guys further point to how dramatically attrition rate goes down once employees start taking loans and depend on their monthly salaries to pay EMIs.

“Neither do we have to convince employees to stay, nor do we have to give all that jazz to employee about how he is the most valued resource and how he is not underpaid and how for him things are going to change for good in the company soon,” another senior HR from banking industry told Faking News, “In fact you won’t believe, even I am hooked on to my seat for 4 years, because of my house loan EMI, despite having a rather hectic work schedule for an HR of 2 hours a day.”

Sources from different companies claim that soon many companies will have loan approval departments in place.

“We will encourage employees to take loan for even the tea that they have at tapri outside,” revealed a source.