Pune: In a very strange turn of events, the fastest growing IT company in India (based on their own numbers), have fired one of their senior manager when he was unable to speak at least 15 jargon during his 10 minute speech in an all employee meeting. The company conducted a press conference and after so much bad publicity on social media about this issue.
Company has explained their policies in detail for speaking in all employee meetings. “We are working with world’s best management consulting firm Mango-G, and we have implemented their guidelines in all our cadres,” HR VP Mr B.C. Resourcewala explained.
“It is very important for all our employees to follow the company policies. At his cadre, we were expecting him to deliver at least 15 jargons in a 5 minute speech, he was given 10 minutes to speak and he barely said 12, which is below the project lead level,” he added.
When our correspondent reached out to the expelled employee, Mr K.L.P. Diwakar for his comments on the company’s stand, surprisingly enough, he responded in very apologetic manner.
“I am very sorry, this was so unfortunate, I was well prepared, I had Productibilty, Gamification, Technomanaging, Diversification and Future-proof-resourcing right at my fingertips, although I have no idea what each of these mean,” Mr Diwakar stated.
But as per Mr K.L.P. Diwakar, the meeting was not about discussing vision and mission statement to employees, but it was about human side of resource development and social connect and he was not informed about this in advanced.
“I never knew that it was something real, I thought terms like ‘Social Connect’ and ‘Resource Development’ are used to make our vision statement look well sized on an A4 page at font size 18. I tried using classic terms like ‘Techno-Functional’, ‘Value-add’ and ‘Business to Tech’, but my sentences were not making any sense even to me. I still made it to first 5 minutes without any suspicion as no one was really paying attention, and my seniors were busy counting my jargons. But in the next 5 minutes I could not find any jargon which can fit in the context, apparently BIG Data and HADOOP and DRONE Economics are real things and are not jargons,” Mr K.L.P. Diwakar continued.
The Global Operations VP Mr. Dick (Deepak) Khanna, refused to comment on statements made by Mr Diwakar, but he added to the statement made by Mr Resourcewala earlier.
“Based on our own survey, we are number 1 in customer satisfaction, and also we are the fastest growing company in certain non-classified segments of certain industry sub clusters, we cannot afford to have a manager who cannot make up jargons on the fly, I myself come up with 1 jargon a day, and some of them are so ambiguous that I use them while arguing with my wife.”
So far none of the big IT firms have offered a job to expelled Mr K.L.P. Diwakar, and it is least likely that he is left with any career option in IT.
Veteran industry analyst, Mr. Bachain Mainframewala has explained this problem in layman term, “See news like this spreads very fast in the industry, and no IT company can afford to have a Manager who can be such a slob in coming up with jargons. Also, Mango-G consults most IT companies; my advice to Mr K.L.P Diwakar would be to make his part-time share trading business as a full time career.”