New Companies Bill, which was passed in Rajya Sabha today, makes it mandatory for profit making companies to spend on activities that can be identified as Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR).

As it could soon become a law, various companies have announced what they perceive as CSR activity. Faking News got in touch with some of them, and they are ready to spend on the following activities:

Zubaan Pe Lagaam

CSR by Center Fresh

Itch Guard has decided to send free stock to Mahesh Bhatt, while Center Fresh (zubaan pe lagaam) will send free stock to Digvijay Singh.

Bisleri will tie up with IT companies in Bangalore to distribute free mineral water to techies, who can use the water to wash their hair and stop hair-fall.

TCS, Infosys, Wipro, and other IT companies claimed that they were already doing CSR by hiring unemployable engineering students. But additionally, they will unblock Facebook and Twitter for one hour during office.

Pepsi, Coke, and other soft drink companies will give free stock to farmers for using them as pesticides.

Apple, Starbucks, and Ray Ban will sell products at only at 200% margin to people below poverty line. They claim it as huge CSR.

Tata will launch a special edition of Nano for beggars, who can now chase people driving Merc and BMW (especially in Mumbai traffic where all vehicles advance with the same speed) and get alms.

Vodafone, AirTel, Reliance, and other telecom companies will waive loans of those who have defaulted on payments, especially of those who change residential addresses and run away without paying dues.

Dr. Batra’s and real estate companies won’t send spam SMS for one day.

Kingfisher Airlines will pay one day salary to its employees.

and, TV news channels will shut themselves off for one day.

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