NEWSWIRE

New Delhi. The Zakir Hussain Memorial Trust, an NGO run by Union Minister for External Affairs Salman Khurshid has sought massive grant from the Government of India to provide about 136 crore hearing aids to the whole population of China as the country has ‘failed’ to hear India’s repeated requests to refrain from crossing the LAC and intruding into Ladakh.

“We have pleaded to China in almost all flag meets and diplomatic level meetings to stop its soldiers from intruding, but it seems that they failed to hear anything,” said MEA Khurshid in an exclusive interview to Faking News.

“I was moved by their plight our NGO has decided to extend a helping hand by distributing hearing aids to each and every citizen of People’s Republic of China citizens,” he further added.

Salman Khurshid

Khurshid shows how stressed the poor Chinese are

For this project of manufacturing and distributing over a billion hearing aids, Khurshid’s NGO is seeking billions of US Dollars (because Rupee value is falling) from the center as this will strengthen national security and improve bilateral ties with China.

On being asked whether he was sure that the grant would be sanctioned, he answered in affirmative.

“First step is to get papers signed by the Chinese authorities certifying their disability. The signature experts of our trust are working day and night to learn how to sign in Chinese script, which is not an easy job,” Khurshid said.

“Come on, it’s not forgery. If the Chinese can copy everything, we can’t copy their signature?” Khurshid protested when this Faking News reporter wondered if his NGO was getting into another forgery controversy and scam.

With elections nearing and Congress high-command repeatedly reprimanding him for lowering party’s standard of corruption to a meager 71 lakhs rupees, pressure is increasing on Salman Khurshid to show a more impressive performance as soon as possible, sources say.

Other sources, those not believed by Faking News, reject the “raise the bar of corruption” theory and claim that UPA Chairperson Sonia Gandhi is upset over repeated incidents of Chinese incursion to India, and that’s why Salman Khurshid came up with this idea.

While other sources in the Congress party suggest that with an ageing Manmohan, renouncing Sonia, and reluctant Rahul Gandhi, claims are secretly being made for the Prime Ministerial candidate of UPA-3, and Salman Khurshid is desperately attempting to impress Mrs. Gandhi anyhow with his “achievements” and facilitate his elevation to the first Muslim Prime Minister of India if the ultra-secular alliance regains power in 2014.

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  • Vision

    Joker or a Beggar? If sarcastic ignore & laugh it off. If serious keep a tab on the trust as already known for earlier scandals.

  • True Indian

    The Ultra Secular tag of the UPA will distinctly please a lot of people including a certain Ms Dutt, Choudhary, Ghose, Mr Sardesai, Akhtar etc (names, if bearing resemblance to any person alive or dead are mere coincidences).