NEWSWIRE

Mumbai. Ramesh Daud, a software engineer from Mumbai, yesterday surpassed Milkha Singh’s 400 meters record of 46.16 seconds while playing Temple Run on his phone. The astounding feat was achieved late night yesterday, after he clocked his 400m run in 43.9 seconds.

“This is the proudest moment of my life,” remarked Ramesh, after the race. “Running has always fascinated me, right from Pamela Anderson’s graceful strides in Baywatch to Urmila Matondkar’s sensuous cantering on a beach in Rangeela. Since the day I saw Bhaag Milkha Bhaag, I have been inspired to emulate this feat. But in a short time of six days, it was impossible to develop my physique like Farhan Akhatar, so I chose this unique way of achieving the same.”

Temple Run

An exciting moment from the historical run that took Ramesh into record books

Ramesh’ father too was apparently instrumental in motivating Ramesh towards this feat by frequently hollering “Bhaag Ramesh, Bhaag” every now and then, though it is rumored that this was more out of concern for Ramesh’s morbid obesity.

Sources close to Ramesh added that this required intensive training and practice, which included close to 14 hours of game-play everyday.

“He adhered to a strict diet of burgers, fries, and aerated drinks. He also minimized all other physical activity in order to channelize his energies into his training. In order to increase his versatility he even practiced playing in extreme conditions, such as playing while hanging from a train footboard, while eating his dinner, and while sitting in the loo. Just look at those six packs on his thumb!” observed a close friend, “It just speaks volumes about his dedication.”

His detractors, however, were dismissive. “Ever since he joined engineering, he has failed to patao a single girl. The truth is that he got inspired by Farhan Akhtar getting laid with three girls, including a foreigner, in a span of three hours, just by running fast. I am quite sure he will now create a Facebook page titled Bhaag Ramesh Bhaag and go around begging for people to ‘like’ it,” one of his batchmates said on condition of anonymity.

The Athletics Federation of India, meanwhile, has announced that it would sponsor a free upgrade to Temple Run-3 for Ramesh whenever it is launched. Developers of Temple Run, on the other hand, are rumored to be adding a new avatar Milkha Singh in their new version of the game, with hidden detours on the race track where one can go and hook up with other female runners.

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  • mps_delhi

    Mast hai! Enjoyed.

  • time_not_pass

    acha h…acha h!!

  • ravi (newdelhi)

    now break the record in real life.

  • Vinay

    rofl very funny .. keep up the good job Fakingg news .

  • vijay Gupta

    My neighbour has broken that record already
    When he drank and fell from terrace of building of 500 m in length .believe it or not
    Within 4.33 sec he was on ground floor

  • Deepak

    Nice..entertaining