Mumbai. Tata Sky subscribers here are going to organize a havan at Azad Maidan to keep rains away from Mumbai during the ongoing Champions Trophy in England. The Havan will start this evening and the fire will stay lit during the entire duration of the tournament.
The havan is an attempt to please the God of rain, Indra, and keep him away from Mumbai for the next couple of weeks. The arrangements are in full swing at the Azad Maidan where a massive pandaal is being erected.
Speaking to Faking News, an organizer of the havan, Dukhi Ram said, “We want to enjoy this tournament in the comfort of our home but as you know, the relation between rain and Tata Sky signal is like the one between India and Pakistan. They just can’t co-exist! Every time it rains, we lose the signal and miss out on the excitement of the matches.”
Mr. Ram went on to say, “Yesterday, during the exciting game between Pakistan and West Indies, Tata Sky was working fine when it rained in England, but once the play resumed and West Indies lost their 7th wicket, I lost my signal as it started raining here in Mumbai. I almost suffered a heart attack thinking about the possibility of a Pakistani victory. Thank god they finally lost. But I decided not to take further chances and do something to stop the rains here in Mumbai.”
“I talked to fellow Tata Sky subscribers in my society and we decided to come together and unite the power of our individual prayers. We created an event page on Facebook and so far, 100,000 people have confirmed that they will be attending this Havan,” the Dhukhi subscriber added.
When asked whether they are being selfish as farmers in Maharashtra are suffering due to the drought and are really looking forward to the Monsoons, another organizer Mr. Pareshan Aatma interrupted and said, “Didn’t we solve the drought crisis by observing a waterless Holi? Anyway, if the problem still exists then the few farmers who are still surviving after such a long drought can survive for couple more weeks too, no? Even we have suffered a drought of proper cricket, we need this relief of ICC Champions Trophy. For the last two months, we were watching wet t-shirt contests between cheerleaders during IPL, this is our Nirvana!”
When questioned if they tried calling customer care service of Tata Sky before taking this “extreme” step, Mr. Ram said “Sir, you must be new to India. In India, it is easier to get through to God than to the customer care executives.”