Mumbai. India lost the second test match to England by a massive 10-wicket margin at the Wankhede stadium. However, all does not seem lost. At the fiery post-match conference, Dhoni, accompanied by coach Duncan Fletcher, took the media head-on.

The 10-wicket loss is sure to boost the confidence of the Poms but Fletcher felt otherwise. “The English came here thinking we will defeat them 4-0 and now they don’t even know which test they might win. We fooled them,” the coach said.

When asked if the demand for square turners had backfired, Dhoni accused the media of misinterpretation of facts: “I had asked for square turners for English batsmen only, and not for Indian batsmen, however, you guys misrepresented my demand.”

M S Dhoni

Dhoni reacts after explaining his strategy

Dhoni went on to claim that the ability of Indian batsmen to play on turning pitches was unquestionable.

“Definitely, we know how to play, our entire team played twice on this Wankhede pitch unlike the English. Except for Kohli, who got out on a full toss, we all used the pitch well,” Dhoni pointed out.

A reporter from Dignity Foundation asked about Sachin’s low scores in the test match when suddenly Sachin Tendulkar stormed in and said, “Definitely, it is true that Monty got me twice but it is he who is bamboozled and not me. You see, Monty now does not know if I will get out to a turning a ball or to the one which does not turn. It is a strategy.”

In an uncharacteristic outburst Sachin further said, “You media guys are so stupid.” Sachin declined to take any further questions and stormed out of the press conference. It is learned that he had a Fevicol ad to be shot.

Meanwhile, Dhoni and Fletcher confirmed that India will be dropping the non-performers for the third test at Kolkata.

“Pujara scored just 6 runs at a strike rate of 120.00 in the second innings and so clearly needs to improve his temperament. Pujara will be replaced by leg-spinner Piyush Chawla,” Dhoni explained the team’s strategy to bamboozle England.

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Pushkar is a scientist and heads Indian Astrobiology Research Centre, Mumbai.

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