NEWSWIRE

Mumbai. Sticking to their vow of taking revenge of Kasab’s death, terrorist group Lashkar-e-Taiba has carried out their first attack. On Friday morning, which is also the release date of Aamir Khan’s latest murder mystery Talaash, they have leaked the name of the murderer in the movie.

“Indians value TV and Movies more than their public rights and liberties,” a statement form Lashkar received by Faking News read, “That’s why we have decided to strike where it hurts most.”

The devastating attack was carried out this morning when some people saw the name of murderer written on streets when they were out for jogging. Similar incidents were reported from all major cities across the country, which has spoilt the enthusiasm and interest of millions of people planning to watch the movie.

Indian cyberspace has also been bombarded using e-mails, Facebook posts and tweets carrying information about climax of movie. Bulk SMS system has again been misused and it spread the news like wildfire.

Aamir Khan in Talaash poster

Aamir Khan wondering if the government could arrest anyone for leaking the secret of his latest movie

“See, the social media needs to be controlled,” Kapil Sibal used this opportunity to push for online censorship even as he reiterated that there were zero losses to Aamir Khan due to the movie mystery being revealed by terrorists.

However, trade analysts confirm that the morning shows at multiplexes reported very little occupancy, as most of the people who did advance booking didn’t show up. With the spread of the revealed mystery, it’s expected that the weekend business of much awaited Aamir’s ambitious project will be very minimal.

While Sibal stuck to his zero-loss theory, he condemned this shameful act of terrorism and appealed to the citizens of the country not to get disappointed, and show the spirit that they had shown in wake of real terrorist attacks.

“The Mumbai spirit,” Sibal said, “Let us continue to tolerate and enjoy everything around us even if someone fucks with our happiness.”

Sources say that the government has also ordered an inquiry if people from Pakistan could be behind this leakage of the movie mystery. But Congress leader Digvijay Singh gave a clean chit to Pakistan and claimed that CAG Vinod Rai could be the person responsible as reports were often leaked from his office.

Meanwhile Bollywood has expressed its anger over the whole issue on Twitter. Suspense thriller directors are really blown off with this out of the box attack. Director duo Abbas-Mustan, whose Race-2 will release next, has apparently asked for an insurance package from banks to cover their losses if terrorists strike again.

“There is no mystery to be revealed in my next movie – The Attacks Of 26/11 – no, Kasab doesn’t die of Dengue there!” Ram Gopal Varma tweeted.

Report filed under:

Movies


  • Mania

    hahaha :P

  • Anon

    The way you bring Kapil Sibal and his “ZERO LOSS THEORY” in almost all your articles is amazing :)

  • RamJi

    Wah Wah kya post hai !!

  • Prabhakar

    nice one …

  • http://twitter.com/mallrui mallrui

    Yaar tumahara last line is always hitting and more suspenseful than Talaash. Btw Talaash sounds like Search for TheLaash. Can yu ask diggy to watch this movie a few times to explain to Rahul Baba

  • http://www.facebook.com/samantha.dixit Samantha Dixit

    good article. very humorous