NEWSWIRE

New Delhi. Frustrated with the fact that there were IAS officers who continued to act against various irregularities in the departments they were posted at even though wrongdoings and scams were routine things in most departments, the government has decided to bring a legislation to rein in such errant officers.

“Being honest is a good thing, but one has to be pragmatic and practical,” Law Minister Salman Khurshid claimed, “What we are witnessing are sporadic cases of ‘absolute honesty’ that some officers are hell bent on practicing. This is neither advisable nor reasonable.”

Khurshid especially pointed out cases like those of Haryana IAS officer Ashok Khemka, who, despite being transferred over 40 times in his 21 years long career, was still trying to run the system in an ideal and perfect way.

“Who in his right frame of mind would order an inquiry into deals between DLF and Robert Vadra after the Law Minister and Finance Minister of the country openly defended Vadra?” a candid Salman asked, “This is not honesty, this is madness.”

Justice Katju

Sources indicate that Justice Katju, who supports reasonable restrictions on Free Speech and comes up with totally batshit crazy ideas once in a while, could be asked to frame a set of comprehensive clauses that will put reasonable restrictions on honesty of public officers and private citizens.

“Khemka is pushing the limits and misusing his right to be honest,” he explained.

In order to rein in officers like Khemka and other whistleblowers, the government will amend the constitution to put “reasonable restrictions” on honesty, Union Law Minister announced.

“Just like we have put reasonable restrictions on Freedom of Expression and Free Speech, we will put similar restrictions on honesty,” Mr. Khurshid announced.

Sources say that these reasonable restrictions on honesty could be similar to those put on Free Speech through the first amendment of the constitution, so that they pass the test of law and legacy.

Faking News understands that post this constitutional amendment, a government official would be allowed to be honest unless there is an instance of a) threat to national security, b) threat to public order, c) incitement to an offence, d) defamation, e) offense to sentiments of a community, f) indecency and immorality.

“If honesty of a public officer, e.g. an IAS officer exposing a casteist or communal leader, is feared to cause rioting by that particular leader’s supporters, the officer would be expected to dump his honesty in favor of public order,” an expert explained the future of honesty after the constitutional amendment.

“He would also be expected not to be honest as it may hurt the sentiments of the community that the corrupt politician may belong to,” the expert explained the “reasonable restrictions” on honesty, “Similarly, if there is a sex scandal involving a leader, the officer would be expected to cover up the scandal in favor of decency and morality.”

The government hopes that corruption cases would come down drastically if these “reasonable restrictions” are placed on honesty of some officers.

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Assorted


  • Vikas

    This is a work of genius! Seriously. Full marks to PP and FN. Touches the important issue of freedom of speech through corruption issue. Lovely work.

  • Vikas

    This is a work of genius! Seriously. Full marks to PP and FN. Touches the important issue of freedom of speech through corruption issue. Lovely work.

  • Manish

    One of the best by FN!

  • http://profiles.google.com/giribalajoshi Giribala Joshi

    This is very complicated, but I guess those who can pass the civil service exams can understand this!

    • FN Reader

      Don’t worry! the articles on Faking News site are too tough to understand for female readers in general.
      It is plain simple english dumbo.
      BTW you wasted our time with such comment.

      • abc

        @ FN reader, dont generalise about females if you have found one occsional dumbo here….
        as for giribala joshi…. hmmm…. she has mentioned the name of civil services!!!! m sure she thinks it to be some exam for becomig civics professor….
        “oh civics is different from civil!!!!… ” she shall ask now. looking at her difficuty in understanding the above article,,,, it shall be no surprise.
        beta giribala, you should just read “mayapuri”, “filmi kaliyaan” and toi. this site is not for you.

        • def

          And who are you to call others dumbo, Avatara of Aryabhata or Einstein? To me, the proof of Black Scholes option pricing formula is complicated, but I fully understand it and can prove it anytime. I guess you do not understand the difference between “complicated” and “incomprehensible”.

      • Civilized Netizen

        Reread your comment, are you proud of it? The great woman who gave birth to you was a female, was she not? Must we pounce upon somebody who posted an innocuous comment with a caustic remarks like above?

      • Giggles

        So now we understand the kind of women you’ve known till now, just step out of it and attempt to know more women, it will change your world

      • Giribala

        Lol! My comment was meant as a compliment to Pagal Patrakar who writes such complicated, well-researched, highbrow, prophetic, fake articles for lowbrow people like you and me.

  • PK

    Really amazing piece of work Softy

  • PK

    Really amazing piece of work Softy

  • Alok

    best one Faking new Best One …

  • G Vishwanath

    Dear Sri Pagal Patrakaar,

    Among all the contributors here, I liked your writings the best
    Carry on!

  • adi

    brilliant article! loved it..

  • raghuromio

    You rock PP… Great