Mumbai. Middle class, which has already its ass on fire due to inflation, corruption, crime, family matters, social commitments, professional challenges, and other existentialist problems of daily life, has been asked to worry about a couple of more issues even though it didn’t appear to affect it directly.
Thinkers have accused the middle class to be absolutely selfish for not accommodating unsettling discomforts, like human rights violation thousands of miles away, to its already fucked-up life.
“How the hell does it matter to them if they start worrying about just a couple of things more?” thinker Akhil Waghmare wondered and accused the middle class, especially those living in India, to be selfish, coward, and having low IQ.
Thinkers like Waghmare, who wake up each day to fight for and bring justice to victims in various parts of India, wonder why a middle class person, already feeling suicidal due to professional and personal frustrations, doesn’t feel the pain of activists not being allowed to protest in Gujarat.
“Selfish pricks,” rued Waghmare, “They can only worry about stuff that hurts them – corruption, crime, and price rise. They don’t care if a poor farmer is dying in Vidarbha or a poor lady fasting in North East.”
Responding to such routine criticisms, which shoot up when a thinker wakes up in a bad mood or is exposed to harsh realities of the world, middle class representatives have conceded that they indeed were selfish.
“Yes, bloody we don’t care about such issues!” said a visibly and perennially upset Harish Mehta, a middle class sales executive who had a fight with his wife last night and got a dressing down by his boss this morning for failing to meet his weekly sales target.
“And when was the last time we even appeared caring towards such issues to these thinkers?” asked Harish, “Why do they even expect us to change just to suit their ideological and idealist likings? Why can’t they plan their grand campaigns without taking us into account? Even my wife has stopped expecting that I’d change. She has planned for the next outing without taking me into account!”
Taking exclusively to Faking News as no one else seemed interested in listening to his woes, Harish further claimed that not only middle class, every class was selfish and didn’t care about issues that didn’t directly affect them: “Have you seen a poor farmer fighting for free speech or ridiculing Kapil Sibal for internet censorship?”
“See! They are nothing but selfish cowards and with low IQ!” thinker Akhil Waghmare said, claiming victory over the Indian middle class.