NEWSWIRE

Mumbai. Faced with anger and criticism from Mumbaikars over potholes in the roads, the Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation (BMC) has come up with a master plan to name the potholes after famous personalities, so that the demand to remove them goes down drastically.

Speaking to newsmen at a naming ceremony of a pothole in front of a working women’s hostel in Andheri, Mayor Shraddha Jadav informed that these potholes would be named after famous personalities from different walks of life and from around the globe.

“It will be India’s Madame Tussauds,” she claimed, “where everyone will be represented by a pothole having similar features.”

For example, the pothole in front of the women’s hostel was named “Shakti Kapoor”.

Mumbai pothole

Apparently, this pothole will be named after Rakhi Sawant; the logic was unknown, or perhaps absent, thus becoming the reason.

BMC Mayor pointed out to the fact that while the list of famous personalities and celebrities was increasing rapidly, the number of roads, roundabouts etc., which can be named after them in their honor, was not increasing in the same proportion.

“We cannot build any more roads or streets as we are out of money and out of space. Naming potholes is the only way to keep the rich and famous happy,” she argued.

Ms. Jadhav further informed that BMC was already identifying “features and characteristics” of various potholes around Mumbai and soon they would be named after suitable personalities.

Sources suggest that the biggest pothole in Mumbai, which may appear like a mine, could be named after Yeddyurappa, while potholes outside wine and beer bars could be called “Mallya”. The potholes in “no honking” or silent zones, such as those near hospitals, could be named after Prime Minister Manmohan Singh.

BMC is hopeful that once the potholes are named after personalities, the political parties or fans of celebrities would oppose any demand of those potholes being filled and repaired, as it would amount to insult to the personality whose name it bears.

“In fact, we would allocate a budget for maintenance and conservation of these potholes,” Shraddha Jadhav informed, “Potholes named after historical and religious figures could qualify for UNESCO heritage list, which would even attract some global funding.”

But BMC is not pinning all its hope on UNESCO funds, Ms. Jadhav informed that the corporation was planning to approach Bollywood superstar Shah Rukh Khan Khan to buy some potholes and get them named after himself or characters Ra.One to promote his upcoming movie.

BMC hopes that this will lead to a race between the Bollywood stars to become number one, with Aamir Khan and Salman Khan approaching the corporation to buy more potholes for themselves, thus helping the organization earn some revenues for itself.

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Based and working in Mumbai for last 8 years. Always striving to look at funnier shades of life

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  • http://www.shootingfromthemouth.blogspot.com Anita Rane

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA this article is so awesome!

  • Rashmi

    picture in this post is too good ;)

  • http://www.fakingnews.firstpost.com Mumbaikar

    BMC is hurting sentiments of pothole lovers by linking potholes with stupid celebrities.

  • rahman

    amazing. good to read something different, funny and natural.

  • Ashwaruda

    Fantastic! Very Original. Truly Creative.