NEWSWIRE

Mumbai. Despite its best attempts to impart quality education and learning experience to its students, Global Business School of Andheri, widely recognized as one of the leading second rung business schools in India making false and exaggerated promises to students, has failed to make any progress on that front. On Wednesday, the b-school squarely blamed third rate students for its failure and also for burgeoning number of second rung business schools in the country.

“The jokers are not interested in learning at all! They are just looking for an extended two years of college life. All that they inquire about if whether the classrooms and hostels are air-conditioned and if they’d get to visit some European countries for a few weeks.” Arun Damle, Director of GBS said, pointing towards a bunch of fashion savvy youths loitering in the reception area.

MacBook for MBA

One of the most popular ads by GBS attracting hordes of third rate students to enroll for its two-year MBA program

Global Business School (GBS) offers free laptops to its students and promises a two week ‘industrial tour’ to Belgium to its students, something that has helped it attract a large number of third rate students and millions of rupees every academic session.

“Now we have lost all the fire to provide quality education like the top MBA institutes. At least it’s proving to be a nice business model.” Arun Damle conceded, further adding, “In fact, such things even help us get a better ranking in some of the b-school surveys. Such foreign tours count as ‘global exposure’ and fetch us higher ranks; goes well with our name as well!”

Damle hopes that further surveys for ranking of business schools may take into account number of air-conditioners, MacBooks and cars on the campus, and help GBS get a ranking higher than the reputed MBA schools in India.

“I don’t trust my boys to help me shed the tag of being a second rung b-school, but other things are improving.” Damle said. He agrees with a recent NASSCOM survey stating that only 25% of all the MBA graduates were employable.

“Dude, you have to give it to us. 0% of them are interested in studying when they come in, 25% employability is just awesome.” he argued.

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  • ishaan

    Global Business School is a real MBA college, run by Rai Factory… I mean Foundation… :P

  • Raina

    Arindamn has competition!
    But he still has a monopoly on mental constipation and verbal diarrhea.

  • Whitemonk

    :)
    PP, Arindam aur uska college might dhamkao to sue you!

  • ron

    looks like that pony-tail asshole’s got competiton.u know who i’m talkin’ ’bout

  • Manish

    Seriously he looted us ,cheated parents,wana be management guru , Listen management hero dont try to be a hero buy cheating parents and destroying innocent youths careers,shame on you ,u self proclaimed guru who drives bentley’s and aston martin by the hard earned parents money and destroying young lives ,what a fraud,students fail to learn anything each semister consists of 16 subjects with 3 months gap semister examz and laptop and tour that lure students to join in.

  • Shivayan

    Comeon Manish….. Arindam is here to make money out of the middle class aspirations and insecurities of getting a degree(MBA) to get better jobs and high paying ones.

  • http://www.iipm.com Arindam Chaudhary

    They would never be able to compete with us. We are no.1 in global exposure.
    Shut the F** up all of u, i’ll sue u.

    • dipen

      :) :). good one dude..