NEWSWIRE

New Delhi. Terrified at the possibility of not being able to complete even the basic construction requirements before the scheduled start of the Commonwealth Games, the organizing committee is reported to be planning to create Swine Flu scare in the capital to delay the games. Trusted sources inform Faking News that the committee sees it as the most effective mean left to escape blame for a shoddy performance.

“Last evening’s heavy showers ended up halting and pushing back the construction work at many places in Delhi, which led the committee to be absolutely confident now that it could never complete the work in the given time. The only way left was to somehow delay the games to get more time to finish the work.” informed a source in the CWG Organizing Committee.

A file photo showing Swine Flu scare in Delhi

Would such masks be able to cover up the mismanagement?

To delay the games, the committee has resolved to spread the scare of Swine Flu in the National Capital Region of Delhi.

“They are planning to fake a few cases of Swine Flu and are currently hunting for people with serious respiratory diseases. Once such a guy is hospitalized and the news is out, rest of the work would be done by the news channels and the WHO.” our source revealed the game plan.

CWG committee considers it a foolproof plan and is confident of implementing it in time, unlike the construction works, and achieving the end results.

“Last year, many sporting events were canceled in Mexico due to scare of Swine Flu. Once a few cases of infections are reported, many countries like Australia and UK would waste no time in issuing travel advisories to their citizens against visiting Delhi and NCR, thus delaying the games.” our sources inform.

Earlier, the CWG committee was hoping that the high level of crime in the NCR could scare the participating countries and eventually delay the games. In the past few months, a few Jat bodies had even threatened to disrupt the games if they (Jats) were not included in the OBC category, but the participating countries were hardly scared.

“The lack of criminal activities talking place in South Africa during the recently concluded FIFA world cup has also demoralized the committee. South Africa has crime rates comparable to NCR but it was disappointing to see the games completely unaffected.” points out our special correspondent Khamba, even though his analysis gives some hope to the committee.

But the CWG committee doesn’t want to depend on the criminals to do the job and have finalized their plans to spread the scare of Swine Flu. Unconfirmed reports suggest that “Swine Flu Panda”, created by Faking News, could be declared as the brand ambassador of the game next week, because Panda was a young sports personality as sought by CWG organizing committee chairman Suresh Kalmadi.

Report filed under:

Sports


  • Rohit

    excellent plan by mr. Kalmadi. our country would be spared of a national embarrasment! ;)

  • Raina

    Good plan, one that might actually work. I hope SK has a plan B in place because it is very likely that visitors will say no problem, we’ve been vaccinated already……

  • Arvind

    Heh heh Antonio Maino and her stupid chamchas have a big egg on their faces now.

  • http://hellisnext.blogspot.com/ Chirainda Blogger

    Breaking News: Kalmadi to run naked if CWG is a success!!

    • Paro

      lol..! :D

  • Sourav

    Sack Kalmadi to save our country’s reputation & sports… ditto 4 all other laggards heading our sport bodies!!

  • Pingback: FIFA World Cup leaves local criminals fuming

  • Paro

    WISH they had ACTUALLY gone through with this plan.. *sigh*..
    much better than the embarrassment we are facing now…

  • http://www.facebook.com Adithya

    well Ididnt get the joke in the swine flu panda!
    But the article was very funny :)