NEWSWIRE

Dubai, UAE. An apple, which was dropped from the highest tip of Burj Dubai (Dubai Tower) to double-check Newton’s laws of motion and Gravitation, has disappeared and has been untraceable since it was dropped by His Highness Sheikh Mohammad Bin Rashid Al Maktoum. The decision to drop the apple was taken after various Arab and European scholars disputed the validity of Newton’s findings, especially the theory of gravitation.

Apart from the theory of gravitation, the apple was also supposed to validate Newton’s laws of motion, especially the second law. The exact height of the Burj Tower, which remains a mystery till date, was to be ascertained using one of the equations of motion (h=½.g.t^2) based on the second law. And if the result were to agree with the official version on the height of the tower, Newton’s laws would have been officially recognized in the richest emirate.

The Lost Apple

The Lost Apple

“His Highness took a bold and modern step but somehow the apple never reached the ground. It’s an unfortunate and serious development and raises questions over Newton’s laws and theories. It’s incumbent upon the Newtonian scientists now to prove that the laws are still valid.” leading scholar Zakir Bin Zaid said.

While the moderate scholars like Zakir Bin Zaid term the development as ‘unfortunate’, a few of the hardliners have declared the whole act of dropping an apple as ‘infidel’ and have asked Sheikh Mohammad to apologize.

“Apple is the forbidden fruit and I wonder what Sheikh was doing with it on the rooftop of a tower.” said Maulana Zawahiri, who has now joined Taliban after renouncing his UAE citizenship five years back, from some unknown and unbombed part of Pakistan, adding, “There is nothing to validate, we always knew that Newton’s laws were wrong; if every action had equal and opposite reaction, bombs should have imploded back after exploding.”

Meanwhile a massive manhunt has been launched to locate and recover the missing apple. Various theories have been put forward regarding the disappearance of the apple. Many people believe that the laborers from India and Pakistan might have stolen the apple mid-air as they get only one roti and a bowl of daal to eat on normal days.

“They might have thought that Sheikh was rewarding them for their hard work with an apple. Thousands of laborers were used to build Burj Dubai and one lucky person might have grabbed the apple as it fell, and fled away with it so that the other laborers don’t demand their share.” Habib Hussain of Moradabad, who had run back to India hiding in a toilet of an Air India flight, said.

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  • http://totalgadha.com/tgtown/bazinga/ bazinga

    Not for nothing is the BurKha our MAN of the Week – totalgadha.com/tgtown/bazinga/2010/01/08/man-of-the-week-is-not-a-man/

  • Mohit

    August 17, 2005 Intelligent falling is the subject of an article in The Onion.[6]

    There is a thin line between plagiarism and inspiration , be careful or else be mocked at like Pritam (the music director)

    • Rahul

      Nice to know that you cared to click the link given in the article above (in the last word of the first paragraph) – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intelligent_falling
      the [6] stuff in your sentence clearly shows that you came to know about the Onion article only after clicking the wikipedia link given in this article. Does it not itself prove that the article makes no attempt to hide where the inspiration comes from?
      Also, take a look at this – http://www.fakingnews.firstpost.com/about/faqs/#Q11

  • Mohit

    Ok agreed . My bad . I never really accused of you plagiarism , all i said there is a fine line b/w inspiration and the aforementioned. Hope its allright to say that.

    • Rahul

      sure sir :)

      • Mohit

        Titles have been abolished long back in India ..or are you just being sarcastic?

  • Karishma Agrawal

    There shouldnt be an issue over missing apple. They can always drop another apple and see were it goes!!!!!!!!!

  • Ahmed Kazikian

    It’s obvious what happened. The Burj Dubai has “setbacks.” That is the ground level of the building is many many meters (horizontally!) away from the tip. They should have dropped the apple off the World Trade Center, except that’s no longer a possibility.