NEWSWIRE

Dear Pagal Uncle,

I am writing to you to let you know that I’ve discovered “holy shit”!

I had always wondered what was ‘holy shit’ when I used to hear so many people using this term in daily and telly life. A couple of times I asked people what was ‘holy shit’, but they laughed at it and never told me. I looked up in the dictionary and although I could find meanings of ‘holy’ as well as ‘shit’, I couldn’t figure out what was holy shit, but today I can proudly tell you that I have not only found the meaning, I have found “holy shit” itself!

Little Johnny discovering Holy Shit

Little Johnny discovering Holy Shit

I am writing to you to share my discovery with fellow readers of Faking News and I hope that you and your readers would recommend my name for some awards. I also hope that other newspapers and television news channels would notice my discovery after visiting your website and would take my interviews. I hope I’m not hoping or asking for too much.

Well, coming back to “holy shit”, I would like you to know that it is some sort of elastic container made of polythene like material. One is supposed to store adhesives or similar kinds of sticky stuff in them. Obviously if you touch adhesive with bare hands, it feels very messy and that’s why I guess they call it shit. I’m not very sure why they call it holy as my parents are not very religious. Maybe readers of Faking News can help me find that.

I found this thing lying on the floor in my balcony this morning when I went out to pee in the cactus flowerpot. I took it inside my home and asked my mom what it was. She answered, rather excitedly, “Holy Shit! Where did you find that?”

She immediately took it from me and went to my father and started arguing with him. I guess my father was careless in keeping the “holy shit” safe and secure. My parents didn’t return it back to me, I wonder why.

I am attaching a picture of “holy shit” that I took from my mobile with this mail. This would help you and your readers recognize it easily and explain to me why they call it so.

Yours truly,
Little Johnny.

attachment:

Holy Shit!

Holy Shit!

Report filed under:

Letters


  • Kaala Vin

    as a calvin worshipper, my sentiments are hurt over calvin being depicted as little johnny in this news report. i demand apology and if FN doesn’t aplogize, i’ll trigger riots in the country

    • http://newsflush.blogspot.com/ pagalpatrakar

      Holy Shit! :D

  • NS

    Ahem… Kaala Vin ….as a former worshipper of FLs… my sentiments are hurt over the fact that FN (whom I was introduced to via FB) have been depicted as Holey. In fact unholey shit would be more appropriate and you must educate your bete (noir?) appropriately.

  • Anknown Pagal

    dats y dey say shit happens!!

  • AS

    Very Funny News !!!!!

    I liked it !!!!! Keep Posting.. !!!

    Kaala..Vin..:
    Please do not mind such stuffs and please don’t get sentimental about a comic character..

  • Muslim Idiot (yes, tautology)

    I thought it to be cow-dung! :P :D

  • Cool down

    ^^^ I am non-believer Hindu btw…. And have nothing against fellow believers and any single religion. Just kiddin, so keep it cool! :)

  • anshooool

    sooooo… u mean to say god shits condoms !! duh !!